The episode starts with Alan leaving rehab feeling very good with Jake picking him up. However Jake almost kills him revealing Megan is pregnant. When Alan arrives home in his mail he is being audited and later Alan owes the IRS 80 grand but to Alan's luck if he is taken for everything he has he only has to pay 4 dollars. Moments later Walden is revealed to be sleeping with Lyndsey and he kicks Alan out of the house because it would be creepy for Alan to hear them having sex. Alan, furious leaves the house but his car engine blows up and he has to give a "happy ending" to a truck driver to get to his mother's house. Alan, blindsided by his son, reamed by the IRS, rejected by his lover, betrayed by his friend, molested by a truck driver, cast out by his mother, and rained on by God, goes to
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| - The episode starts with Alan leaving rehab feeling very good with Jake picking him up. However Jake almost kills him revealing Megan is pregnant. When Alan arrives home in his mail he is being audited and later Alan owes the IRS 80 grand but to Alan's luck if he is taken for everything he has he only has to pay 4 dollars. Moments later Walden is revealed to be sleeping with Lyndsey and he kicks Alan out of the house because it would be creepy for Alan to hear them having sex. Alan, furious leaves the house but his car engine blows up and he has to give a "happy ending" to a truck driver to get to his mother's house. Alan, blindsided by his son, reamed by the IRS, rejected by his lover, betrayed by his friend, molested by a truck driver, cast out by his mother, and rained on by God, goes to
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Starring
| - Ashton Kutcher
- Walden Schmidt
- Angus T. Jones - Jake Harper
- Jon Cryer - Alan Harper
- Conchata Ferrell - Berta
- Holland Taylor - Evelyn Harper
- Marin Hinkle - Judith Harper-Melnick
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| - The episode starts with Alan leaving rehab feeling very good with Jake picking him up. However Jake almost kills him revealing Megan is pregnant. When Alan arrives home in his mail he is being audited and later Alan owes the IRS 80 grand but to Alan's luck if he is taken for everything he has he only has to pay 4 dollars. Moments later Walden is revealed to be sleeping with Lyndsey and he kicks Alan out of the house because it would be creepy for Alan to hear them having sex. Alan, furious leaves the house but his car engine blows up and he has to give a "happy ending" to a truck driver to get to his mother's house. Alan, blindsided by his son, reamed by the IRS, rejected by his lover, betrayed by his friend, molested by a truck driver, cast out by his mother, and rained on by God, goes to his storage bin where all his stuff is put by Walden. Alan is getty lucky with a woman whilst Herb arrives. He said he took a DNA test on Milly and turns out she is Alan's daughter. Herb calmly shoots Alan, killing him. It then turns out to be a dream and Alan wakes up at the stress clinic. Everything starts over again with Jake picking him up (in Walden's car). It is revealed Jake never actually slept with Megan but was stranded on third base for months. Jake drops off Alan and goes to his girlfriend's with Walden's car so that it may help him slide into home. Alan goes into the new redecorated beach house with voice recognizance system that only works for Walden. Much to Alan's sadness, it no longer reflects Charlie's home, prompting him to admit that he no longer belongs here. Walden asks him if he is going to move out, which Alan declines immediately. The episode ends with Alan and Walden hugging, but Alan is worried that he might need Walden's help to flush the toilet if it's voice-activated.
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