About: Certificate of Hitlertude   Sponge Permalink

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Then, in 2002, the World Institute of Hitlerology introduced the Certificate of Hitlertude. The offended party merely writes down his or her argument and sends it (along with a stamped self-addressed envelope and 10 Euros) to the Institute's headquarters in Nürnberg. Top experts in the field of German history, Nazi theory, and the biography of Adolf Hitler will then examine the argument and compare it to known things that Adolf Hitler said. They will then, after five to seven business weeks, post you a certificate (suitable for framing) bearing the Hitler Quotient of your argument, expressed as a percentage:

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rdfs:label
  • Certificate of Hitlertude
rdfs:comment
  • Then, in 2002, the World Institute of Hitlerology introduced the Certificate of Hitlertude. The offended party merely writes down his or her argument and sends it (along with a stamped self-addressed envelope and 10 Euros) to the Institute's headquarters in Nürnberg. Top experts in the field of German history, Nazi theory, and the biography of Adolf Hitler will then examine the argument and compare it to known things that Adolf Hitler said. They will then, after five to seven business weeks, post you a certificate (suitable for framing) bearing the Hitler Quotient of your argument, expressed as a percentage:
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dbkwik:uncyclopedi...iPageUsesTemplate
Revision
  • 186323(xsd:integer)
Date
  • 2005-09-26(xsd:date)
abstract
  • Then, in 2002, the World Institute of Hitlerology introduced the Certificate of Hitlertude. The offended party merely writes down his or her argument and sends it (along with a stamped self-addressed envelope and 10 Euros) to the Institute's headquarters in Nürnberg. Top experts in the field of German history, Nazi theory, and the biography of Adolf Hitler will then examine the argument and compare it to known things that Adolf Hitler said. They will then, after five to seven business weeks, post you a certificate (suitable for framing) bearing the Hitler Quotient of your argument, expressed as a percentage: * At 91-100%, the thing you said is indeed deemed to be Just What Hitler Would Have Said. You lose your argument. Try again. Examples: 'I think that invading Poland would be just tops!', 'Let's slaughter as many Jews as possible!' * At 71-90%, you have said something similar to what Hitler would have said, but not quite as bad. You will probably lose your argument, but you are entitled to do so in bad grace. Example: 'Ein Volk! Ein Reich! Ein careful series of governmental checks and balances!' * At 51-70%, you have said something that Hitler might have said, but so would most other people. Examples: 'Is it just me, or could the French do with a solid kicking?', 'My moustache really itches!' * At 26-50% is the smartass band; things that Hitler would have said, but which are so banal as to make the comparison worthless. Examples: 'Good morning,' 'I don't think much of Communism,' or 'Where did I leave the keys to my Mercedes?' * At 25% or less are remarks that the experts agree that Hitler almost certainly never would have made. Examples: 'Give peace a chance,' 'All you need is love,' or 'Sh'ma Yisrael Adonai elohaynu Adonai echad!'
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