abstract
| - A social worker called Laura is visiting Chandler and Monica to determine if they are good parents and to put them on the waiting list at the adoption agency. Upon arriving, she realizes she remembers the building because she'd slept with Joey and he never called her back, to which Monica and Chandler quickly pretend to not be friends with him. Joey comes in to attempt to boost their chances (because he's a celebrity and it looks good on the small people but Chandler quickly slams the door and claims it's a crazy person roaming the halls called Bert. Joey climbs up the fire escape with a bat thinking Bert is their codeword for danger. Laura spots him and Joey turns it around on her saying she didn't call him, to which she apologizes for. She then says that Monica and Chandler will be excellent parents and puts them on the waiting list. Phoebe and Mike are planning their wedding and decide to not have a big fancy wedding and donate their wedding funds to a children's charity. However, after Monica gives Phoebe her veil and doesn't hide her negative feelings about Phoebe getting married at the city hall, Phoebe and Mike decide they want the money back, which they get with a lot of sarcasm from the staff member serving them. Phoebe however realizes that those kids had a similar childhood to her's and decides to again donate the money but when they get there, she keeps on changing her mind. The member of staff, frustrated with their inability to make their decisions, rejects the money instead, encouraging them to enjoy their wedding. Phoebe and Mike are satisfied with the outcome, as they can come back after the wedding and make a bigger donation. Rachel tells Ross he can't take Emma on the swings because of a traumatic incident she had as a four year old girl, getting her hair tangled in the swings and having to have a chunk cut out. Ross convinces her otherwise and Rachel changes her mind when she sees how happy Emma is, but after Ross is knocked over by a kid on a swing, Rachel goes back to banning Emma from the swings. However, they compromise and Ross holds a spider in his hand (he has a fear of spiders) and Rachel goes on the swings, but accidentally knocks Ross over again after telling him the spider was on his neck.
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