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| - The episode begins with band recital for the county fair. Lisa suggests that the band change from "Stars and Stripes Forever" to "Living in America". So, they do so. At the county far, we meet our guest star of the week, the Bachman Turner Overdrive. They perform a song, but have no bearing on the plot. The family prepares to see the Springfield Elementary gang play, and they do very well. Lisa even gets her own sax solo. But, they lose. Why? Ogdenville had glow sticks. Lisa complains that this is illegal, and get's her "Good Sport" trophy revoked.
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| abstract
| - The episode begins with band recital for the county fair. Lisa suggests that the band change from "Stars and Stripes Forever" to "Living in America". So, they do so. At the county far, we meet our guest star of the week, the Bachman Turner Overdrive. They perform a song, but have no bearing on the plot. The family prepares to see the Springfield Elementary gang play, and they do very well. Lisa even gets her own sax solo. But, they lose. Why? Ogdenville had glow sticks. Lisa complains that this is illegal, and get's her "Good Sport" trophy revoked. A horse named Dunan is about to be dunked into a pool by a Jerkass animal trainer. Homer and Bart decide to take Duncan home. Then, Comic Book Guy appears, stating that they already had a horse, and that Homer had to take a second job. (Homer: Does anyone care what this guy thinks? Others: NO!) Apparently, Homer has to race the horse to make the investment back. Apparently, the horse can make a good placekicker. Too bad the NFL won't accept him. So, Bart recommends that they race him in the derby. Meanwhile, Lisa writes a letter to Bill Clinton, despite Marge telling her to not worry. Homer and Bart arrive at the derby. After a gag involving Moe finding a beautiful lady and having a cartoonish heart problem (bangs out of his chest), and Homer threatening not to bring Duncan to the glue factory if he loses (which is a certainty, as the odds are 5,000,000:1) the race starts. Duncan is afraid to go, but after a long time, goes out of the gate running. "What a shame; the race is already over!". Homer tries to cheer up Bart, until he realizes how bad he placed. ("YOU WERE NUMBER FIVE? YOU STINK.. damn good!) They decide to give Duncan a makeover. Lisa is now trying to call Bill Clinton, as he never wrote back.Marge tries to tell her to stop... just as we see Duncam's new look, now known as Furious D. They then go back down to the downs. While there, Marge tries to make a bet that all the horses will have a good time. She is redirected to the "Wuss Bets". But, she does change her mind, and develops ANOTHER gambling problem. (CBG: "I'm watching YOU!") Duncan's quick turnaround makes hm the champion of all of the races in the derby. And Nelson..... This of course, infuriates the other Jockeys. So, they invite him for a drink. He then is pulled down a slide into... ...A land populated by jockey elves. In song, they explain their backstory... and then threaten to kill Homer if he does not lose the race. Homer is then sent back. Even he wonders if that was just a bad dream. The elf crushes those hopes rather quickly. ("NO DREAM! LOSE THE RACE!") So, Homer tells Bart that they have to lose the race. But, he never explains to Bart why. So, Bart winds up winning, even with attempted assault against him by the elves. The elves then begin chasing Homer through the city. Marge and Lisa then decide to defeat them.... with water. They fall, and also can not escape a Hefty bag. Despite this, they try and negotiate their escape. ("We'll give you gold!") And, what happens to Duncan? The status quo occurs, with no explanation given to Duncan's fate. Meanwhile, Bill Clinton shows up to put Lisa's worries to rest. He gives her the trophy, and Marge tells him that he's giving a Family-Unfriendly Aesop by telling her to complain to get her way. Clinton ends the episode by stating that he's just as lousy as the moral.
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