The political crisis afflicting the four kingdoms stems from a complex relationship between its denizens.
* The weasels are an aggressive race of anthropomorphic creatures. They dwell in the salted melon fields. They are known for flipping the fuck out, and their king is the most practiced in this ability. The weasels crave elven eggs, and go on periodic raids into elf territory for them. The weasels representative at the negotiations is the Weasel Emissary.
* The elves are known for their cunning and intuition. They are perhaps the most clandestine of the four kingdoms. Elves can grant wishes, provided you give them enough incentive. Elves have an unusual lust for the pies created by the clowns; they will steal them right off the clowns' windowsills. The elven representative at the
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| - Plight of the four kingdoms
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| rdfs:comment
| - The political crisis afflicting the four kingdoms stems from a complex relationship between its denizens.
* The weasels are an aggressive race of anthropomorphic creatures. They dwell in the salted melon fields. They are known for flipping the fuck out, and their king is the most practiced in this ability. The weasels crave elven eggs, and go on periodic raids into elf territory for them. The weasels representative at the negotiations is the Weasel Emissary.
* The elves are known for their cunning and intuition. They are perhaps the most clandestine of the four kingdoms. Elves can grant wishes, provided you give them enough incentive. Elves have an unusual lust for the pies created by the clowns; they will steal them right off the clowns' windowsills. The elven representative at the
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| abstract
| - The political crisis afflicting the four kingdoms stems from a complex relationship between its denizens.
* The weasels are an aggressive race of anthropomorphic creatures. They dwell in the salted melon fields. They are known for flipping the fuck out, and their king is the most practiced in this ability. The weasels crave elven eggs, and go on periodic raids into elf territory for them. The weasels representative at the negotiations is the Weasel Emissary.
* The elves are known for their cunning and intuition. They are perhaps the most clandestine of the four kingdoms. Elves can grant wishes, provided you give them enough incentive. Elves have an unusual lust for the pies created by the clowns; they will steal them right off the clowns' windowsills. The elven representative at the negotiations is the Elf Exemplar.
* The hogs are the most unappealing of the four kingdoms. Their Pulchritude is considerably low, and will only associate with characters who are equally as low. The hogs sustain themselves on salted melons; however, their kingdom is so muddy and unappealing that the melons refuse to grow there. Thus, they must gather their supply from the weasels. The hogs representative at the negotiations is the Hog Provost.
* The clowns are the most presumptuous of the four. They excel in song, dance, and piemaking. Their primary source of entertainment is to pick on the hogs by slapping them on the behind and watching them squeal. Only a jerkwad would hang out with them. The clowns representative at the negotiations is the Clown Pontificate.
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