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| - Quailfeather: *walking* *sees Brambleclaw* Brambleclaw: Why are you alive? Quailfeather: Because I like cheesy tacos. Brambleclaw: *turns into a mouse* *scampers away* Quailfeather: *catches him* *makes him into a cheesy taco using her magical wizard powers* Firestar: Can I have some of that cheesy taco? I've always wanted to eat Brambleclaw. Quailfeather: *shrieks like a banshee* "Of course, Firestar! I love cream cheese! Firestar: *eats the cheesy taco made out of Brambleclaw* *runs away cackling as he turns into the Good Witch of the West* Dorothy: There is no Good Witch of the West! Gosh, who's writing this? Forestpaw: I am, Dorothy. You hurt my feelings! *runs away sobbing* Dorothy: *calls after Forestpaw* Your name is weird! Quailfeather: Why are you here? Dorothy: Because I wanted to invite you on my journey on the Yellow Brick Road. Quailfeather: I wondered why that was there. Dorothy: Do you want to come? Quailfeather: No. But I think I know who will want to come. *shoves pile of feathers into Dorothy's face* I know that Bird here loves long, magical journeys! But- he has a cold, and a cough, and the flu, and diarrhea, and altitude sickness, and a fear of long yellow roads, magic, evil witches, and long journeys that involve magic. Have fun! Dorothy: Come on, Bird! *holds out slimy pile of feathers in front of her as she walks* Quailfeather: *calls after Dorothy* Make sure he doesn't pee on you! Dorothy: *runs away* Bird: *snore* Dorothy: Eew. Bird: *snore* Dorothy: Gross! Bird: *snort* *snore* Dorothy: Stop it! Bird: *falls apart* Dorothy: *runs away* Nasty! Eew! Strange creature: I am a strange creature. Dorothy: Obviously. Strange creature: Can you use your magic so I'm not a strange creature anymore? Dorothy: *waves hands* Hocus Pocus! Strange creature: *turns into a strange cat* Thank you. I hated being one-sixteenth Griffin, one-sixteenth dog, one-sixteenth cat, one-sixteenth fish, one-sixteenth tree, one-sixteenth bird, one-sixteenth duck, one-sixteenth Swishy, and one-half human. Dorothy: What are you know? *dreads answer* Strange creature: Oh, just a combination of cat, earth, and human. Dorothy: How can you be part earth? Strange creature: *falls apart into large mound of dirt* Dorothy: Um, okay. Bye! *skips away down the road* Lion: Help me! I don't have a heart! Dorothy: How can you not have a heart, if you're alive and breathing and stuff? Lion: I don't know. I just don't have a heart. Tinman: I don't have a heart, you nitwit! You don't have any courage! Lion: I'm too scared to tell her! Tinman: *sighs* That explains a lot about him. Dorothy: I'll take you to the Evil Witch of the West and she'll give you a heart, and some courage too! Lion: But I'm too scared to go! That road looks so scary! So does that tree over there! We must escape! *runs through cornfield* Tinman: Three, two, one. Lion: It's too scary! *screams* Dorothy: You guys, I haven't even made it a mile yet! *looks back at Quailfeather, who is staring at her with a weird look on her face* Lion: *screams* The world is ending! *runs away* *falls off a cliff* Tinman: That's the end of him. Lion: *screams* Blood! Tinman: ... Or not. Anything can happen in the magical land of Hoogalie. Quailfeather: *comes over* That lion is weird. Want to come back to my hut where we have dead mice and water on leaves? Hurry, because it's evaporating! Dorothy: No. I'll go back home to Kansas. *taps shoes three times and disappears* Quailfeather: Forestpaw, you can come out now. Forestpaw: I love bombs! Dorothy: *remains fall around them* Lion: *screams* The world is ending!
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