| abstract
| - Unobtanium is a non-existent, make-believe element of the periodic table which does not in fact have a place on the periodic table due mostly to its non-existence and make-believeness. While the fairy tale element has been used in absurd narratives throughout history - starting with the Hindus - it is used in contemporary science-fiction as a plot device to make totally impossible things become totally possible, fictionalisticaly that is. Two particularly preposterous uses of the element were in the in the 1985 film, Star Trek VI The Voyage Home, and most blatantly in the 2009 film, Avatar. In many other, shall we call, Spicy films, Unobtanium is subtly alluded to as being a valuable "make the impossible fantasy become credible as well as an orgasm superconductor." Any one familiar with any of this naughty cinema might assume we are talking about the stimulant Viagra. If you think that, then you clearly are not paying attention since Viagra is made up of real chemicals and exists in this world, right here right now and simply happens to be blue and sticky. Unobtanium is something that does not actually exist, and for the sake of science fiction writers, cannot exist in the actual world (otherwise they would have to come up with something new to make far out cinema enjoyable). If Unobtanium were found to actually exist it would destroy the entire science fiction story genre. This explains why all attempts at mining the element, such as on Earth's second moon, are sabotaged by Hollywood screenwriters. One should never under-estimate the power of "Hollywood". Unobtanium is said to be so incredibly expensive that any thought experiment on its value will result in brain exploding paradoxes. Paradoxes which destroy the very concept of absurdity. One gram of Unobtanium is considered to be so expensive it would require a planet about the size of Jupiter made out of solid gold to equal market value at a concept modern humans could understand. According to James know-it-all Cameron, Unobtanium is worth a mere 20 million per kilogram (2.2 lbs) unrefined on Earth. But the monetary denomination is not specified, meaning it could very well refer to 20 million tons of solid gold per kilogram - which accords with the preceding assessment. When considering the obvious issue of Unobtanium being unreal its price is often classified as “unaffordium.”. It seems to Uncyclopedia that this value estimate could hardly take into consideration the costs of shipping the raw material from planet of origin to Earth, which expense could be astronomical. Unobtanium is odorless, tasteless, solid at room temperature and very sticky.
- Unobtanium (pronounced un-ub-TAIN-e-um) is a highly valuable mineral found on the jungle moon of Pandora of the James Cameron's Avatar Universe which Humans mine to save the Earth. Image:Unobtanium.jpg
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