About: Darth Damien   Sponge Permalink

An Entity of Type : owl:Thing, within Data Space : 134.155.108.49:8890 associated with source dataset(s)

Darth Damien wasn't always named Darth Damien. Sad, but true. Disappointingly true. He was born of a jackal, when the jackal wandered into the hospital and shat him out into the world. What love. Anyway, Damien was adopted by two rich kids, who had just had their baby aborted because the mum couldn't stand that bitch. Damien was then adopted into the family by his totally unsuspicious parents. "Tonight, Mr Thorn, God has given you a son," said a priest who would pop up later, had it not been for Mace Thorn, Damien's step-dad, raping him to death on the spot.

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  • Darth Damien
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  • Darth Damien wasn't always named Darth Damien. Sad, but true. Disappointingly true. He was born of a jackal, when the jackal wandered into the hospital and shat him out into the world. What love. Anyway, Damien was adopted by two rich kids, who had just had their baby aborted because the mum couldn't stand that bitch. Damien was then adopted into the family by his totally unsuspicious parents. "Tonight, Mr Thorn, God has given you a son," said a priest who would pop up later, had it not been for Mace Thorn, Damien's step-dad, raping him to death on the spot.
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dbkwik:darth/prope...iPageUsesTemplate
abstract
  • Darth Damien wasn't always named Darth Damien. Sad, but true. Disappointingly true. He was born of a jackal, when the jackal wandered into the hospital and shat him out into the world. What love. Anyway, Damien was adopted by two rich kids, who had just had their baby aborted because the mum couldn't stand that bitch. Damien was then adopted into the family by his totally unsuspicious parents. "Tonight, Mr Thorn, God has given you a son," said a priest who would pop up later, had it not been for Mace Thorn, Damien's step-dad, raping him to death on the spot. Damien hated his step-parents from the start, cos he was different from his uptight political family as he loved rock 'n roll and one day he was run over by a car and went to Hell where he met his real dad, Satan. Satan told him he was too early but convinced him to listen to more moosic and chill the funk out. Anyway, Damien was resurrected by a doctor who he personally raped. Damien loved rape. Anyway, cut to six years later when he realizes his parents aren't giving shit to him. He chucks his mum downstairs and kills her foetus. His totally unspsicious parents have, like, before hired a nanny to oversee Damien, but the nanny immediately teaches him in the ways of the Force where he learns to hypnotize people and become President. Later, the nanny has lesbian sex with Damien's mum and it ends with the mum flying out of a hospital window and smashing into a van. Back in the planet Isreal, Damien's step-dad finds out the Devil is Damien's real daddy. The step-dad seems to be the only one who takes any interest in his step-son. His mum's a whiny loser. But anyway the step-dad is given some knives to kill the demon infant. He goes back to Alderaan but is shot dead by Stormtroopers before he can get anywhere near the altar.
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