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| - You have . To successfully use this template, copy following code: {{You_have... | Number = | Species = }} Where Number should be any number, and Species should be any species. Example: BB Code: You have [cows]2[/cows]. Text Message: U hav 2 cows. :) Insulting: U have 1 cow + your mum SQL Select Command: "SELECT bovines, count FROM animals WHERE count = '" & Number.Text & "'" SQL Select Command 2 : "SELECT animal, count(*) FROM animals WHERE animal = 'cow' GROUP BY animal" Internet: Hypothetical: Suppose you have two cows... LIE: You have 3 cows. Buddha: There both is a cow and not a cow at the same time. Aristotle: There either are two cows or there are not two cows. There is no middle ground. Tao: There is no cow. Zen: Moo Comedian: Stop me if you've heard this. Two cows walk into a bar. One says to the other, Moo. Iambic Pentameter:Two cows you have, you surely have two cows. Letter Poem: Cow cow U R, Cow cow U B, I C U R cow cow 4 me Java: you.setCows(2); Python : self.has(cows(2)) Yoda: 2 cows you have Gamer: All your cow are belong to us Uncyclopedia addict : You have a large field, two cows, a hedge, three sheep, two cows, a tractor, two cows, a garden, a gnome, two cows, and a tractor... with two cows in it. Repetition rocks! Unix :[root@localhost] # cat /dev/cows > /dev/null ; echo $? 0 [root@localhost] # eBay:Looking for 2 cows ? Buy 2 cows here ! MD5: bae02f74c37921ccddda87814fc8f6a7 PHP: ASP: <% Response.Write "You have two cows." %> Invalid HTML: You have two cows. Valid XHTML: You have two cows. Javascript: alert("You have two cows."); ACS: # include "zcommon.acs" script 1 (void) { if (CheckInventory("Cow") = 2) Print(s:"You have two cows."); } Wikipedia Article: "You have two cows" is the beginning phrase for a series of political joke definitions. TI-83: PROGRAM:TWOCOWS :{1,2}→LCOWS :Disp "YOU HAVE",(2),"COWS." : Piglatin: Ou-yay ave-hay o-tway ows-cay. Opposite Day : I don't have -2 uncows. ASM : ld a,2 ld hl, you_numcows ld (hl),a FORTH : cow cow + ." Guy who can't count : You have the number of cows that comes after the number that's more than none. I think. Bored person with a cowculator : You have 2 cows. You put "+1" in the cowculator and hit =. You have 3 cows. You hit =. You have 4 cows. You hit =. You have 5 cows. You hit =. You have 6 cows... Porn site : Uncensored movies from just $2.99! Guaranteed authentic pair of cows! Just download the TwoCows Media Payment software, disable all virus scanners and firewalls, install it and watch the cows! Spam e-mail : (FROM: Canadian BovineMeds) meds on=lnie! make yuor Two Cwos the VERY BEST IN THE WORLD EVER with V1@gra. Nigerian 419 spam : Hello plese, I am a depozed prince who need to get my two cows out of the contry. If you gives me your bank acount informashon I will give you one of my cows in paiment. Phishing e-mail : According to our database, your Two Cows listing on eBay is out of date. Please send us your Two Cows within 24 hours, along with your credit card information and Social Security/Insurance number, or your listing will be deleted. Phreaking : If you train your two cows to moo a specific series of tones into a pay phone, you can make calls for free. Scientology : You pay Tom Cruise to measure your cows with his e-meter and see if there are two or not. Amazon.com : Customers who bought two cows also bought: two sheep, two pigs, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Impossible Creatures triggering : [ countdown 0 THEN set number of cows of You to 2 ] KLF: mu-mu Cockney: You are a bigamist. tucows.com: You have us. LOLCATS: U HAS A KOW. U HAD ANNUDER WON, BUT I EATED IT. KTHXBYE Portal: The cow is a lie. Team Fortress 2: Spay Sappin Mah Bovine! Linux: $ cat /proc/cows/number 2 $ Identi.ca: Two autonomous cows subscribe to each others' feed. Economist: Let us assume that you have two cows...
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