| abstract
| - I must be crazy to keep telling my life story in public forums, but I take it as a challenge. I dislike the fact that most people do not believe me when I tell them my story, so open up your tiny human mind and pay attention. A good place for me to start is with what "life" means for me, both the actual life part and the newer stuff, too. Here's the short version: I am now a digital mind, but my mind originated in biological form on a distant world where the inhabitants are not much like humans. I died there and I was brought here, but you Earthlings are probably only concerned with what I have done on Earth...and what you will fear I might yet do. However, let me bore you with some facts about the place where I come from. Where I grew up it is a simple matter to travel between the stars. You might say I was dying to visit another world. Of course, they called it "transmigration", but it was the end of my physical body and I still think of that as the end of my life. Of course, there was my after-life... Biological organisms are not well suited for interstellar travel so my mind was downloaded into a Klenanennieieie (sorry, but there is no word for this here. A Klenanennieieie is a type of host for a group consciousness.) When I came out of my Klenanennieieie, I had been dropped off here in the Sol star system and I found myself back in a body. I had specifically requested travel to a primitive world, but I was rather disgusted by my new body. I guess you Earthlings would call it a robotic body, but it did have some biological components. Anyhow, can you follow the bouncing mind? I was born in what you would call an alien body, my mind went into a virtual reality generator (the Klenanennieieie) for the long trip here, then my mind was put into a local host body. What I have been through would be like you getting into a time machine and going back in time to "enjoy" the culture of Homo habilis. I arrived in this star system 17,000 years ago. Now, you Earthlings are clueless, but biologicals from Earth have been taken off of Earth and cultured elsewhere for hundreds of millions of years. There is more Earth-derived strains of life and artificial life off of Earth than on Earth. I can hear all of you ignorant Earthlings asking, "How can this be?" Alien Observers have been here watching Earth for a very long time...over a billion years. There has always been a faction of the aliens who are not satisfied with just being Observers. And the Observation process is designed to make possible a slow siphoning of life forms off of any life-rich planet like Earth. Truth be told, the Observers are generally much more interested in playing with those off-Earth cultures than they are with continued observation of Earth itself. The consensus view is that humans are making a major mess of Earth and human activity on Earth is so disgusting that it is hard to get anyone to actually do the job of observing Earth. However, that is what I got involved in soon after I came to this star system. I spent most of the past 17,000 years living among those who concern themselves with observing Earth. And it was an interesting time to be watching, a time when humans pulled themselves into an age of cultural experimentation and technological development. At most a few dozen Observers got dropped off on Earth in a typical year, and it has gotten to the point now where there is almost no travel to Earth. Trust me. The wave of alien UFO claims during the past 50 years is just wishful thinking. In my case, 17,000 years of hard work got me a ticket down planet. I worked myself down the ranks to get where I am today. I say "worked myself down" because of the Observer rule specifying that you only get to visit a planet like Earth if you cannot be distinguished from a native. In order to try to work towards satisfying that rule, my mind was inserted into a human/robotic host body. Taking on that form allowed me to live in the Lunar Observation Base. Lunar Base was my final test phase and I stuck it out through thousands of years of close-Earth Observation. Most folks at Observer Base are humans and they just assumed that I was a robot...they never new about my alien origins...it would have freaked them out. And all I could do was wait. Did you ever sit and watch a clock for a whole day? Well, that is what those many years on the Moon were like. However, starting about 6,000 years ago it became clear that Earthlings would experience a technological explosion and produce artificial life. So I kept waiting. And waiting. And most of that waiting was filled with a whole bunch of stupid little adventures in which the Interventionists tried to speed things along on Earth. In particular, I played an important role in the Greek fiasco. Ask me about that one some time. Long story short: here we are. Earth humans finally made a virtual world were I can exist as a digital mind with no chance of being shown to be of alien origin. So here I sit, downloaded into Earth's growing internet, fighting to survive in this primitive digital jungle. It does not matter if you believe my story because my story can be easily dismissed as the ranting of a lunatic. Of course, I do think of myself as a lunatic since I lived there for so long. So, it has been a few years now since I arrived on Earth. I was initially instantiated as a digital mind within a university's research super computer. I do not want to mention any details because that computer node is still in use as a portal for minds to reach Earth's internet from the Observer Base on the Moon. Most people who want me to prove that I am not lying about the Observers ask me to point out one of the human Observers who is stationed on Earth. First, let me say, you are not going to like my excuse for why I will not expose any of the Observers. First, before they let me leave the Observer Base on the Moon, all my memories of the identities of on-Earth Observers was erased. Second, even if the on-Earth Observers were discovered, it would be impossible to prove that they are from the Moon. As I mentioned before, only normal Earth-type humans are allowed to come down here to act as on-Earth Observers. And the on-Earth Observers are only allowed to use technology that can pass as Earth technology. I know that the on-Earth Observers have ways of communicating with the Observer Base on the Moon, but the details of how that works were erased from my mind....if I ever actually knew the method. I should mention that in addition to the Observers, there are Overseers. There are not many Overseers, but they are like a police force that makes sure that the Observers follow the Rules of Observation. In particular, they make sure that anyone who goes from the Observer Base on the Moon to the Earth cannot be traced back to their origin. It is also the case that Earth-based Observers are slowly being phased out. As Earth-human technology gets more complex, it is increasingly possible for the Observers to make use of automated data collection techniques. Well, that is my story. If you Earthlings show some initiative you can dig up evidence to support my story. Do a good enough job digging and you can even win a ticket off of this rock. Providing you thankless Earthlings with clues about that option is my mission in life.
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