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[[image:%E8%B2%93%E9%8D%8B.jpg|thumb|An all-time Filipino favorite - The Adobo.]] Philippine cuisine is one of the simplest in the world. Much of what passes for food in this country would gag a drunken Scotsman. Filipinos don't mind eating something that is looking at them. In fact, studies show that dining is more pleasurable when you see the animals' last pitiful expression of sorrow and torment while it is viciously tortured before finally being slaughtered by some fat butcher named Fredo.

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  • Philippine cuisine
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  • [[image:%E8%B2%93%E9%8D%8B.jpg|thumb|An all-time Filipino favorite - The Adobo.]] Philippine cuisine is one of the simplest in the world. Much of what passes for food in this country would gag a drunken Scotsman. Filipinos don't mind eating something that is looking at them. In fact, studies show that dining is more pleasurable when you see the animals' last pitiful expression of sorrow and torment while it is viciously tortured before finally being slaughtered by some fat butcher named Fredo.
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  • [[image:%E8%B2%93%E9%8D%8B.jpg|thumb|An all-time Filipino favorite - The Adobo.]] Philippine cuisine is one of the simplest in the world. Much of what passes for food in this country would gag a drunken Scotsman. Filipinos don't mind eating something that is looking at them. In fact, studies show that dining is more pleasurable when you see the animals' last pitiful expression of sorrow and torment while it is viciously tortured before finally being slaughtered by some fat butcher named Fredo. When preparing meat, just deep fry the motherfucker in a vat of lard, and there you go! Philippine cuisine involves killing pigs (as violently and slowly as possible) and roasting them pagan-banquet style. Pretty much anything organic served with genetically-modified white rice and a spoon is considered a meal. Filipino cuisine must always be cheap and contain as much cholesterol, fat, sodium, and GMOs as possible. Well, at least you'll die happy from the stroke.
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