Contents
| - :Klaus: I finally did it! I've made my decision about whether to stay or go. It took a lot of soul-searching, but in the end...
:All: Shut up, Klaus!
:Roger: Punt!
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:Steve: Check it out! I got full blueprints of our house for my project! The Junior Architects Society is not gonna know what hit 'em!
:Klaus: Are you allergic to vaginas, Steve?
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:Roger: My wine fridge! I had my cocaine in there!!
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:[Stan, Hayley, Jeff and Klaus are trapped in the attic, which is rapidly flooding]
:Stan: [tries to push the attic hatch open] It's jammed!
:Klaus: Hah! Tables have turned, bitches! This whole house is going to flood! Tough luck for you dicks who don't have gills! I guess it's my house now. And I can go wherever I want!! Hahahahaha!! See you never, GOLDFUCKERS! [Jumps out of his fish bowl and into the water] AHH! This is saltwater! It burns!! Put me back! Put me back!! [Hayley comes over and puts Klaus back in his fish bowl] So... A lot of funny jokes just happened now... Ya-hah?
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:[Steve, Roger and Francine hear knocking coming from the house attic]
:Francine: That must be the others in the attic, we have to help them!
:Steve: [looks at the house blueprints, then notices the stairway] Hmm. Looks like we can use this vertical access shaft to get down there.
:Francine: Those are the stairs, Steve. We need to make some kind of rope, maybe out of curtains.
:Roger: As if! You think I'm gonna risk my neck for Stan after what he did to my wine fridge? No way!
:Francine But... what about your wigs? They're all in the attic!
:Roger: [gasps with horror] Get outta my way, I'll kill you!! [Roger runs in Francine's direction. Francine moves out of the way, causing Roger to fall down the stairway] Franny... We need to make... some kind of rope. Perhaps... out of curtains.
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:[The water flooding the attic is continuing to rise. Jeff is crying]
:Jeff: Ah, I'm not gonna make it babe. I want you to take my hacky sack and give it to our grandchildren.
:Hayley: Jeff, we don't even have kids!
:Jeff: I know. That's why I also want you to take this folded up candy wrapper. [Jeff hands Hayley a folded up wrapper] Don't ask me how I did it. Just take it and start our family.
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:Jeff: That shark's in here, man!
:Roger: If they're really attracted to blood, then it's in my room attacking the boxers I wore the day Francine made tacos.
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:Roger's Date: We're gonna have lots of babies!
:Roger: [pushing the girl's head into the water] No no no no no no no no.
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:[Stan, Steve and Francine are traveling through the flooded house. An echoed moan is heard]
:Stan: It's the ghost of Hayley risen up from the depths of Hell. She has unfinished business with me! LEAVE ME BE, SPECTER!
:Francine: No, she's alive! Why would you assume she went to Hell?
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:[Francine searches Steve's bedroom for Hayley and notices the porn magazines on his mattress]
:Francine: What's on the bottom of your mattress, Steve? So many of the girls are Asian. And pregnant...
:Steve: She's not in here, we should keep moving.
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:Steve: [takes out the house blueprints] Okay, according to the blueprints- [the shark suddenly comes up the stairway at the blueprints and eats them] It's hungry for flesh AND knowledge!!
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:Steve: I don't wanna die yet! I haven't experienced the disappointment of being in a monogamous sexual relationship!
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:Stan: [sighs] What a day.
:Cleveland: [off-screen] Tell me about it. I don't even know where the hell I am. [he walks towards Stan]
:Stan: [takes out a gun] Looter!
:Cleveland: [also takes out a gun] Self-defense!
:[two guns are heard cocking and the camera whip pans right to reveal Peter Griffin]
:Peter: A black and a white talkin' as if it's normal! [he walks toward Stan and Cleveland]
:Cleveland: Peter, what are you doin'? You know me!
:Peter: Everybody shut up and let me think! Just let me think!!
:Francine: [walking out the door] Stan, have you... [Stan fires his pistol and Francine falls down]
:Peter: [laughs] Oh man... classic American Dad!
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