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| - The guards paid her no mind as her kodo charged into Silvermoon. Not that they ever did. But today, Keola Greenmane woke up hoping that she were the same person. Physically she was the same but emotionally...she felt completely different. It was her first conflict of self and morality and she had no mother, sister, or great elder to turn to for advice. In fact, she was afraid of seeking advice. Surely she could be forgiven? Keola awoke alone. Keola sobbed, trying to stifle the noise with her hands. "Why didn't you stop me?" She asked, muffled.
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| abstract
| - The guards paid her no mind as her kodo charged into Silvermoon. Not that they ever did. But today, Keola Greenmane woke up hoping that she were the same person. Physically she was the same but emotionally...she felt completely different. It was her first conflict of self and morality and she had no mother, sister, or great elder to turn to for advice. In fact, she was afraid of seeking advice. Surely she could be forgiven? She had woken upon the shore of the Azurebreeze Coast, sore and alone. Her fur was sticky from the encounter, and she discovered sand in uncomfortable places as she sat up. Keola sat there lost in her own mind, for how long she didn' t know. A sob escaped her lips. It was exactly as she had been told. Keola awoke alone. Tossing her loose clothing off she crawled into the surf and began to vigorously scrub. The scent of him was on her, not pleasant as it had been last night. Keola crawled back up the beach and shuffled through her packs hoping she had not been robbed. Alas, he had taken her to such a quiet and remote place, and he was as sincere a gentleman as she had hoped in that respect. Not a hair was missing. She grimaced as she reached for her bar of lavender soap. He had said she smelled good. Diving back into the surf Keola scrubbed herself all over but still failed to feel as clean as she needed to be. She undid her braids and dove deep, letting the sea water wash sand and tears from her mane. She briefly toyed with the idea of diving deep and letting herself go... "NO!" She shouted under the waves, startled by her own breath as it bubbled before her. She wasn't going to be a victim. She had made her choices, dug her grave. And now the consequences were to be had. Keola had made a bad decision. But she still walked the Earth. And the Earthmother hadn't abandoned her. She knew this as she cast a quick lifebloom over herself to be sure she was still whole and alive as she crawled back up the beach. Keola sighed dejectedly as she went through her bags. She had been planning to sleep soundly at the Inn last night, so she had packed light and no fresh tunic was waiting for her. Her clothing was clean enough but items felt dirty. She would have to purify her spirit in the springs at Thunder Bluff to be rid of the layer of remorse upon her. She begrudgingly pulled on all of her clothes and summoned her kodo mount, Chester. Luckily there was a road nearby and Chester was always an intelligent and resourceful creature. On auto pilot, he had brought her to Silvermoon safely. Once inside the city her lumbering kodo ground to a halt and she found herself back on her feet. She turned towards the gate guards and offered one a smile as cheerful as she could muster, but he stared on. She brushed her loose, still slightly damp mane from her face and trudged on to the Inn. Keola was distracted out of her reverie of self-loathing by the elven innkeeper. The older elf woman laid a gentle hand on her shoulder and lead her to a plush lounge behind the curtain. Keola opened her mouth but the woman shook her head, gently patting her shoulder. Keola slumped down onto the lounge as the innkeeper produced a comb and kneeled behind the young druidess, gently combing out her mane. "You didn't come back last night." The woman said slowly. Her voice was soft and unassuming. Keola felt the weight of the world upon her again and buried her face in her hands. "I was a bit worried." The elf continued. "You usually don't go out late when you visit the city." Keola sobbed, trying to stifle the noise with her hands. "Why didn't you stop me?" She asked, muffled. The older elf woman sighed, and began parting her hair for braiding. "I see many people come and go my dear, and I can't make life decisions for them. Luckily, they continue to walk the earth. Most men don't seek blood at the end of the day Keola, just the pleasures a woman can give. Be glad that he didn't take you here. People talk." Keola turned to look at the older woman. "I knew he wasn't going to hurt me. I just..." She wrung her hands. "I wasn't sure what was going to happen." The innkeeper turned Keola back away from her and continued to braid her mane. "It's in the past, druidess. You made the decision to go with him. Whether you knew of his intent or not, you did not come back last night. It's perfectly natural. I suggest you not think twice about it." Keola stiffled a sob. But nodded. The elf lady pinned one braid up for her and redirected her ministrations to finish the other one. "You are responsible for your decision. If you didn't want to go, if you didn't like him, you didn't have to go. The choice was yours. Your only pain is on the inside and you needn't suffer for it. Everyone has made bad decisions Keola, and I do not believe that is your first offense either. Trust me, it's also not the worst." Keola sighed as her other braid was pinned up, the kind old lady giving her a gentle pat on the back. "But he smelled good." Keola murmured. The innkeeper got up and stood before Keola, a kind smile on her face. "That my dear, may have been worth its weight in gold." Keola awoke later that morning to a very empty Inn. Most customers' weren't allowed to sleep past check out, but the lady innkeeper must have taken pity on her. She felt pathetic. Misses went out and did things with misters all of the time. So why was it upsetting her so? Maybe it was the doctrine that the druid trainers had tried to instill in her. Silly things, like don't let a man confuse you. Don't halt your study. You do not need a partner, trust in your power. You are needed in Northrend, don't give up your talents for a man. But she had also been snooping around in the libraries in Silvermoon and had read excerpts of some of the worn novels there. About falling in love, living happily ever after, giving yourself to one person and only that person. Maybe that's all those books were...fantasy. Keola got up and paid the kindly innkeeper her wage, and packed a little bread and cheese. The woman only smiled again as she left. All the advice that could be had was already given. She knew Thunder Bluff to be far, it would take her the rest of the afternoon to make it there, even with properly timing the zeppelin flights. She didn’t want comfort later this afternoon. She stopped by her bank to procure a fresh change of clothing and her portal scroll to Moonglade. Thunder Bluff springs could wait. When Keola arrived in Nighthaven she expected her feet to take her directly to one of the moonwells but instead she found herself sitting on the dock of the lake, picking at her lunch. It was a quiet day and for that she was glad. She knew that there was no way anyone could have known of her deed but she was still self-conscious.
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