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| - Muscle Man: Muscle Dad! Come in, Muscle Dad! Muscle Man (continued): Muscle Dad, come in! I wanna wish you a happy Father's Day! Muscle Man (continued): Come on, Muscle Dad! You better not be pranking me! Muscle Man (continued): Bro? Muscle Man (continued): Geez, bro, who died? Muscle Man (continued): We're here today because my dad put a cactus under a cop in a bear costume, who turned out to be an actual bear. Mordecai: Muscle Man! Mordecai (continued): It's okay, it's okay! Muscle Man: You're right. You're right. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm okay. (goes over to Muscle Dad's picture on the table, pointing) Muscle Man (continued): My dad might not have been the best pranker in the world, but he was the best trucker in the world. (zoom into Muscle Dad's hat) And that hat was his crown. Muscle Man (continued): That's why this urn is filled with the ashes of his hat. As the ultimate Father's Day tribute, I'm gonna help my dad fulfill his final wish, by spreading the ashes of his hat at the Trucker Hall of Fame. Benson: Guys, I'd like you to go with Muscle Man to help him spread those hat ashes. Mordecai: What? Why can't Hi Five Ghost go with him? Benson: (looking back) Hi Five Ghost doesn't deal well with this sort of thing. (sure enough, Hi Five Ghost is seen looking through the window, crying) Mordecai: Okay, we'll go with him. Benson: Thanks. Just make sure to watch after him. If Muscle Man can't spread those hat ashes and get some closure, he may never be the same again. Muscle Man: (on couch, twirling his suit in the air, guzzling a soda) WOO-HOO! WHOOO! (jumps off couch) WHOOOOO! Muscle Man: Thanks for coming along to help me spread my dad's trucker hat ashes. It really means a lot to me. I know that sometimes, I act all crazy when I'm bummed out, so just let me know if I'm freaking out too hard, and I'll stop. Mordecai: No problem. Rigby: Yeah, it's cool. Muscle Man: You dudes wanna listen to some tunes? Mordecai and Rigby: Yeah, we do! Muscle Man: Haha, yeah! And I know my dad wants to listen to some tunes, all right! (goes over to turn on the radio. However, the knob goes loose and crumbles away) Uh? Mordecai: Oh no. Mordecai: Muscle Man, calm down! Chill! Chill! (Muscle Man calms down) Muscle Man: I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I just wanted to listen to some music with my dad. Mordecai: We don't need to listen to any music. It's cool. Rigby: Yeah, man. Muscle Man: Okay. (M&R go back in their seats) Sorry for freaking out, guys. Mordecai: No. No. It's fine. Do you want to tell some stories about your dad? It might make you feel better. Muscle Man: Okay. (begins to tell the story) My dad was the best. Muscle Man: Nobody loved a good prank more than my old man. Muscle Dad: (handing a young Muscle Man the soda can) Here, Mitch! Young Muscle Man: Thanks! (grabs the soda. When he opens it, a spout of soda comes out. Muscle Dad laughs) Muscle Man: We used to play the best pranks on his trucker buddies. Muscle Dad: What's your twenty, good buddy? Trucker Buddy: (over microphone) I'll tell ya, sir, my hog got smokey on my tail! Muscle Dad: You know who else got smokey on her tail? (young Muscle Man chuckles) Muscle Dad: My wife! / Young Muscle Man: My mom! Muscle Man: And one time, at my brother's birthday party... (Muscle Dad pulls up a pinata) Young Muscle Man: Hit it, Muscle Bro! Teen John: I will, yo! (to Muscle Dad) Stop moving her to and fro! (He hits it, and, out of the pinata, scorpions fall out, scaring him) AGH! Get them off! AGH! (squirms to the ground as Muscle Man and his father laugh. We know cut to a teenage Muscle Man and [presumably] Starla, ready for prom) Muscle Man: But he loved pulling pranks on me the most. Muscle Dad: Look at you! My boy is going to prom! You sure you don't need an umbrella? Teen Muscle Man: Dad! We don't need an umbrella! We're just going to prom! Muscle Man: My dad was awesome at pranks, but he was an even better trucker. He would always check in from the road. Muscle Dad: (over radio) Braker, braker! Muscle Daddy here. You copy? (Muscle Man goes over to the radio to answer) Young Muscle Man: Loud and clear, Muscle Dad! Hey, do the thing! (Muscle Dad blows a horn over the radio as Muscle Man chugs his arm. The young Muscle Man laughs as the montage's ripple tranistions back to present day) Mordecai: Wow, Muscle Man. Your dad sounded like he was really awesome. Muscle Man: He was. (driving under bridge) Now let's pull over, I gotta use it! Mordecai: Man, I've never seen Muscle Man open up like this! Rigby: I know! And I gotta say, Muscle Dad sounds like the greatest dad! Bear Dog: Muscle Dad? (the truckers walk over) Boy, I've never heard that name in a long time! Big green guy, loved pranks, trucker of the year hat... Rigby: Yeah, that's him! Were you guys friends with him? (the truckers laugh) Bear Dog: No, we were not friends with him! Why, that puke never rode a big rig in his life! Mordecai: What?! Bear Dog: No, sirree! Why, that ratchet-jaw was nothing but a... (extreme closeup of all his teeth) ...forklift driver. (M&R gasp as Muscle Man comes out of the restroom) Muscle Man: Take that back! Take back what you said about my dad! Bear Dog: Sorry there, ankle-biter, he was just a trucker wannabe! Muscle Man: You shut your mouth-hole! Trucker 2: Remember how he'd sneak into our rigs and call himself in a fake voice? (the truckers laugh) Muscle Man: No, bros! (turns around photo he is holding) You can't fake this, bro! Bear Dog: Uh, actually, you can. (points to two teenages taking a photo near a stand of the Muscle Dad photograph) Teenager: Dude, check it! My butt's Trucker of the Year! (the other teenager snaps a photo as they both laugh) Young Muscle Man: Nice prank, dad! Muscle Dad: (over radio) Yeah, I really got the other trucker for that one! Young Muscle Man: Why are you whispering? Muscle Dad: Oh, there's a hitchiker sleeping in the passenger's seat. Young Muscle Man: Dad, you're the best trucker ever! Muscle Dad: I do it all for you, son. Young Muscle Man: Hey, Dad, do the thing. Muscle Dad: (laughs) Sure, son. (blows an air horn into the air horn) Muscle Man: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Muscle Man: (reading the note) Son, if you're reading this, you punched my face out at the rest stop where I faked that picture. I'm sorry for pranking you all these years... Muscle Dad: (Writing the note and thinking) ...Especially about being a trucker. The world is a harsh place, and I only did it to toughen you up from when I'm gone. Now you know the truth. You aren't a muscle boy anymore. Trucker 1: Muscle Dad! We need those loads now! Muscle Dad: Yes, sir! Right away! Trucker 1: And take off that hat! You ain't worthy of it. (Truckers walk away) Muscle Dad :(Writing note and thinking again) So please, drive to the highest point of the Trucker Hall of Fame, and spread my hat ashes over those stuck-up jerks. It's my final prank from beyond the grave. But if you hate me too much to do it, I understand. (Muscle Man stops reading and walks back to M&R) Mordecai: So, what happened? (Muscle Man hands M&R the note, and the two read it) Mordecai and Rigby: Whoa!!! Mordecai: What are you gonna do? Muscle Man: Maybe he wasn't the best trucker in the world... or a trucker in the world. But he was my dad. And I'm gonna carry out his wish if it's the last thing I do. Mordecai: That's great, dude. We'll be right there with you. Muscle Man, Mordecai, and Rigby: Whooo!!! Rigby: Special delivery! (Throws a brick at the guards' vehicle) (Scene transitions to them driving to the Trucker Hall of Fame, and them at an outlook) Muscle Man: There it is. The Trucker Hall of Fame. Mordecai and Rigby: Whoa!!! Muscle Man: Now let's go spread these hat ashes. (Mordecai, Rigby and Muscle Man walk up to the entrance. Two guards drive up and block them. The guys gasp) Guard #1: Where do you think you're going with that urn, son? Muscle Man: (hides urn behind his back) Uh, what urn? Guard #1: Don't play dumb. We heard about your plan on the horn. You're Muscle Dad's son. And what you got there is his hat's remains. Muscle Man: Let me in, you tools! Guard #1: Those ashes are worhless. Hey, you wanna scatter them somewhere? Heh, (points to the dumpster) why don't you scatter them in that dumpster? Mordecai: Dude, Muscle Man! Rigby: What are you doing?! Mordecai: You gotta turn back! You can't give up! Muscle Man: Come on! Mordecai: You gonna come all this way just to quit?! Rigby: What about Muscle Dad? Muscle Man: Look, bros. My old man was a screw-up. And let's face it, so am I. I'm overweight, I work in a lame park, and you two and Fives are my only friends. But the one thing that a Sorrenstein almost never screws up is a prank. (shown smiling) And my dad's hat ashes in that stuck up Trucker Hall of Fame is the funniest thing I can think of right now. Now, are you ladies in or aren't you? Guard #2: (chuckles) Dumpster. Guard #1: Yeah, I know. I just opened my mouth and it came out. Mordecai, Rigby and Muscle Man: Whooooo! Rigby: Special delivery! Guard #1: Calling all truckers! We have a bogie going towards Memorial Hill! I repeat: A forklift driver's hat ashes are on Memorial Hill! Berg: Forklift driver? Muscle Man: What's going on back there? Mordecai: Dude, let go! Muscle Man: Rigby, catch! Rigby: Got it! Mordecai: We gotta shake 'em! Trucker #1: Hand over them ashes! Memorial Hill's for truckers! Muscle Man: We're not handing over anything! Bear Dog: Oh, yeah?! Rigby: Hurry! Bear Dog's catching up to us! Muscle Man: Hey, Trucker Hall of Fame! Muscle Man (continued): Kiss my dad's trucker hat ashes! Muscle Man: Muscle Dad? Muscle Dad: Heh, heh. Yep, it's me, Muscle Son! Thanks for honouring your old man's last wish. Muscle Man: No problem, Muscle Dad. Huh? Bear Dog: You desecrated this place! Now we're gonna make roadkill outta you! Muscle Dad: Hey, Bear Dog! Need a lift? Muscle Dad (continued): Ha, ha! Did you see that? Muscle Man: Dad, why didn't you tell me you were a forklift driver? Muscle Dad: I wanted you to be proud of me, Muscle Son. I'm sorry I lied to you all those years. Muscle Man: It's okay, Muscle Dad. I forgive you. Mordecai: It's an honour to meet you, Muscle Dad. Muscle Dad: Looks like we got company. Muscle Dad (continued): I'll hold 'em off. Muscle Man: But how, Muscle Dad? Muscle Man (continued): That's what I'm talking about. Muscle Dad: Now go! Mordecai: You sure your dad can handle them on his own? Muscle Man: He'll be fine. Muscle Dad: Come on, pull my finger! Ghosts: No! Muscle Man: I had a great time dudes. This was the best bro trip ever. We'll probably just be jerks to each other again tomorrow. But I really see you guys as good friends. Pranks and insults are just how my old man taught me to show it. Aw man, I sound like such a winner. I'm glad you guys aren't awake to hear this. Or this. Mordecai: Dude, Muscle Man!
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