About: National Health Service   Sponge Permalink

An Entity of Type : owl:Thing, within Data Space : 134.155.108.49:8890 associated with source dataset(s)

Welcome to the National Health Service (NHS) The NHS is publicly funded so it's completly free. Of course this is reflected in the standard of treatment. On arrival at hospital don't expect someone to open the doors for you, and don't expect to see a doctor immediately, not on your first day. Or even your first week. Overall don't expect much. We don't care how many limbs you're missing. If you can't be bothered to call in advance and tell us you might be getting killed, you obviously don't care about living. So really we're doing you a favour. We find this system saves a lot of time.

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  • National Health Service
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  • Welcome to the National Health Service (NHS) The NHS is publicly funded so it's completly free. Of course this is reflected in the standard of treatment. On arrival at hospital don't expect someone to open the doors for you, and don't expect to see a doctor immediately, not on your first day. Or even your first week. Overall don't expect much. We don't care how many limbs you're missing. If you can't be bothered to call in advance and tell us you might be getting killed, you obviously don't care about living. So really we're doing you a favour. We find this system saves a lot of time.
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  • Welcome to the National Health Service (NHS) The NHS is publicly funded so it's completly free. Of course this is reflected in the standard of treatment. On arrival at hospital don't expect someone to open the doors for you, and don't expect to see a doctor immediately, not on your first day. Or even your first week. Overall don't expect much. If you really must see a doctor there is something called a 'waiting list', if you haven't booked your accident in advance you'll just have to wait in line like everybody else. Especially if you want something for free. It's only fair. And remember to have your appointment card ready when you reach reception. Otherwise you'll be sent home. We don't care how many limbs you're missing. If you can't be bothered to call in advance and tell us you might be getting killed, you obviously don't care about living. So really we're doing you a favour. We find this system saves a lot of time. If you haven't actually got fingers to hold the card in, don't be alarmed, just ask someone to cellotape it to your head. Always wipe your feet on the way in, the hospitals are dirty enough already, without you dredging more filth inside. Unless of course you don't have any feet, in which case be careful not to drip blood on the floor, someone might slip and get hurt. And if you happen to grow bored while blood and intestines seep through your fingers, and drip on the coffee table, don't panic. We've got a huge selection of magazines, all from 1983. But don't bother looking at the crosswords they've all been done, however there is a spledidly interesting article about a pencil factory on page five, enjoy! And if you could wipe your organs off the table that would be helpful too.
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