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The Haunted Mansion is a World based off the Series of Disney. it appeared in Kingdom Hearts Anime Video Games.

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  • The Haunted Mansion
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  • The Haunted Mansion is a World based off the Series of Disney. it appeared in Kingdom Hearts Anime Video Games.
  • The film did not perform very well at the box office. Having been made on an estimated budget of $90,000,000, it earned less than $76,000,000 at movie theaters in North America. It earned a further $106,000,000 in the rest of the world. The movie also received largely negative reviews. The Haunted Mansion was rated PG by the Motion Picture Association of America for its subject matter, some frightening images and some use of bad language.
  • NC: Hello, I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it so you don't have to. Well, if you've ever been to the Magic Kingdom, chances are one of your favorite rides is the Haunted Mansion. NC (vo): And how could it not be? With its endless creativity, Gothic atmosphere, and so many clever visuals that no one can see it in one viewing, the Haunted Mansion has become one of the theme park's most praised attractions. [Picture of Captain Jack Sparrow] So when Disney had a surprise monster hit with their Pirates of the Caribbean movie, they figured maybe bringing the same amount of cinematic effort to one of the most famous rides of all time might be called for here as well. Best way to begin? Well, let's have [picture of] Eddie Murphy star in it.
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  • The Haunted Mansion is a World based off the Series of Disney. it appeared in Kingdom Hearts Anime Video Games.
  • NC: Hello, I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it so you don't have to. Well, if you've ever been to the Magic Kingdom, chances are one of your favorite rides is the Haunted Mansion. NC (vo): And how could it not be? With its endless creativity, Gothic atmosphere, and so many clever visuals that no one can see it in one viewing, the Haunted Mansion has become one of the theme park's most praised attractions. [Picture of Captain Jack Sparrow] So when Disney had a surprise monster hit with their Pirates of the Caribbean movie, they figured maybe bringing the same amount of cinematic effort to one of the most famous rides of all time might be called for here as well. Best way to begin? Well, let's have [picture of] Eddie Murphy star in it. NC: Ruined! NC (vo): How can one of Disney's most playfully dark and Gothic ideas be given to such an obviously wrong actor? Not that Eddie Murphy can't do good work, he just...does it so rarely. [Posters of Daddy Day Care and Meet Dave are shown] This is like putting Will Ferrell in Batman [picture of Will Ferrell photoshopped onto Batman], or Sarah Silverman in Sophie's Choice [Poster of her put in place of Meryl Streep is shown], or Pierce Brosnan in a music-- [Poster of Mamma Mia!] Oh, yeah, we're still paying for that. [Picture of Pierce surrounded by several people, all with word balloons saying "Jesus!"] But some actors obviously don't go with some movies. And the sad thing is, they tried to tailor what could've been a really awesome idea with a dark sense of humor to a story as intriguing as the ones you find on the side of Happy Meal boxes. NC: Hell, even [picture of Happy Meal boxes] Happy Meal boxes are looking creepier than anything in this film! So, does anything capture the original creativity of the ride? Well, let's take a look with *sigh* Eddie Murphy's Haunted Mansion. NC (vo): So a boy, who literally has nothing to do with anything, shows up just so the house can tell him to piss off. NC: Well, you heard the movie. It said "go away!" It wants to get rid of us as much as the writing does. NC (vo): We then transition via shit-eating grin to Eddie Murphy trying to sell a house to Overactor #1 [Rachel Harris] and Overactor #2 [Jim Doughan]. Mrs. Coleman: It's just what we've been looking for. Mr. Coleman: There aren't enough plugs. NC: [As Lt. Kellaway from The Mask] Doyle?! Mrs. Coleman: Every house we look at, you find something to pick at. Mr. Coleman: Ugh, I just know what I like. Mrs. Coleman: Would you like a divorce? Cause I'll bring it. Jim Evers: Uh, hey, guys. NC (vo, as Mr. Coleman): Ugh, if I had a nickel for how many divorces were caused by plugs... NC: Actually, that sounds worse than I meant it to be. Mrs. Coleman: We love the house! NC (vo): He closes up another deal at the Riki Tiki Room where the happy couple wants to celebrate, but Murphy has to get to his anniversary dinner in time for--Oh, it's this bullshit setup! NC: See, I didn't know if they were gonna do the clumsy dreamer who has to prove himself, [A picture of Martin Short in A Simple Wish is shown] the cowardly weirdo who has to prove himself. [A picture of Eugene Levy in American Pie is shown] NC (vo): But now I see it's the workaholic douchebag who has to prove himself. NC: Because as we all know with family films, there's only three stories to tell. NC (vo): Seeing how the last film combining a black father with ghosts used this method to such [poster of Ghost Dad] fucking greatness, it only makes sense to use it again here. NC: What a world of maybe a child-sized handful of possibilities. Woman: Did you just sell their house? Jim: I sure did. Man: Cause we're looking to buy. NC (vo): And seeing how Murphy clearly, for some reason, doesn't believe in business cards, he misses the dinner with his very angry wife. Jim: Okay, I'll tell you what we're gonna do. We're gonna take off this weekend. Sara: What? Jim: Like we did last year with the kids. Just us and the kids for the whole weekend. How's that sound? NC: [as Jim] How about Orlando? I voiced so many annoying characters for that attraction. [Pictures of Eddie Murphy's animated characters, Mushu from Mulan and Donkey from Shrek are shown] Surely we can get in for free. NC (vo): She agrees to the trip, but Travis-sized Chris Rock here is afraid of a spider in his room. Jim: It's time I teach you how to kill a spider the right way, all right? NC (vo): Yeah, I remember how many kids had Houdini posters hanging in their room. Maybe that was a plot thread that was going to go somewhere, but again, they probably saw how well it worked in Ghost Dad and, seriously, movie, nobody should have this many strange connections to that fucking film! Jim: Yeah, right. NC (vo): But they get a call to look at a house that could be a big payday for Murphy and decides to take a look with his family before their weekend break. Jim: Megan, don't slam the door like that. It's very sensitive. Megan: It's a car, Dad. Jim: Ah! It's not just a car. It's a very delicate piece of machinery. [Speaks to the car] She didn't mean what she just said. She didn't mean that. NC (vo): Well, can't imagine why that scene was put in there. NC: You'd see this obvious setup with bowling pins having the words "break me" written on them. [Three bowling pins, all having Murphy's face on the top and having the words "Break me" on them, are superimposed into the scene.] NC (vo): So they enter the haunted mansion while, not badly designed, does look like every other creepy movie house you've seen before. Nothing really sets it that much apart. NC: Hey, look! [Several images of Casper, Morticia from The Addams Family, Count Olaf from A Series of Unfortunate Events, and Luke from The Haunting are superimposed into the mansion.] NC (vo): There goes Casper, Morticia, Count Olaf, and Owen Wilson reminding us to be scared. Luke: Really creepy. NC (vo): Thus we're introduced to the butler of the house and clearly the only person having any fun in this film, Terence Stamp. That's right. [A photo of Stamp as General Zod from Superman is shown.] General Zod is playing this part. [Chuckles] And if you want an idea for what you're in for, take a listen to how he says his very first line. Ramsley: Sara Evers? NC: [Laughs] And I'm not even kidding. That is literally how he says every single line in this film. NC (vo): He has a machine gun vibrato that would make Elmer Fudd's laugh jealous. Ramsley: [various scenes] The master.../Sounds wonderful./The storm has flooded the road. NC (vo): [as Ramsley] I'm hunting wabbits. Hehehehehehe. NC: Seriously, Zod. What are you doing in this film? Zod: Well, remember when I said I did some movies in the past I wasn't very proud of? NC: Oh. Well...yeah, but, I thought you meant, uh... Zod: What? Thought I meant what? NC: I just kind of made the assumption that you...you... Zod: You thought I was doing porn, didn't you? NC: It's just the way you're dressed, you know, I... Zod: No, no, no, no, no. I see. Just because a man wears all leather and exposes his man cleavage means he must be some sort of gentleman of the night! NC: It's just most people outside of that industry don't usually dress that way. Zod: Well, according to The Matrix, all Houstonians dress this way. It doesn't mean I have sex for money! NC: Okay, okay. I'm sorry I made that assumption. Malcolm: Okay, Zod, ready when you are. Drop the pants, and let's get filming. Zod: Well, I'm doing it now! That's only because some opportunities have opened up for me! NC: Opportunities? Zod: Yes, apparently, when the Man of Steel lasers your balls off, everybody wants to see what it looks like. Might as well make a little cha-ching off of it. NC: I'm gonna forget anything about your genitalia what-said and get back to the review. Zod: Fine. I got work to do, too. [Leaves while zipping down his pants. A woman's scream is heard.] Well, I guess I should get used to that. NC (vo): So Zod takes them to the owner of the house, named Edward Gracey. Edward Gracey: Tell me, Mr. Evers, do you believe in ghosts? NC (vo, as Jim): Well, I had brought my career back from the dead several times. Does that count? Ramsley: The storm has swollen the river. NC (vo): [Laughs] Okay, Zod, I know the voice you're going for, but has anyone ever actually heard another person talk like that? You're making Michael Crawford sound like the Micro Machines guy [John Moschitta Jr.]. Ramsley: I'm afraid there will be no leaving the mansion tonight. NC (vo, as Ramsley): It's as dark as the music of the night, Christine. NC (vo): So they can't leave the mansion and decide to spend the night there. Ramsley: Will there be anything else that you require, sir? Jim: Will you go get us some chocolates? Ramsley: Pardon? Jim: You know, the little chocolates they put on the hotel pillows? Sometimes... NC (vo, as Ramsley): Save it for Shrek 12. [normal] Of course, no one actually sleeps, and they start snooping around the house because...well, it's a big creepy place and they all have Penny Gadget syndrome. Jim: Interesting. NC (vo): Murphy discovers the batpoles while the daughter also makes a shocking discovery. Megan: What do you think it is? NC (vo): Or, at least, it would be shocking if she was even the tiniest bit surprised by it. Megan: I think it wants us to follow it. [The orb phases through a door.] It does. It wants us to follow it. NC: [Looking at an iPhone and speaking deadpan like Megan] Dude, we're the iPhone generation. The only time we're ever actually shocked is when Facebook changes their layout. [Looks at his iPhone] They did it again? [Looks away] My life is over. NC (vo): The wife as well bumps into Gracey, who seems to be quite taken with her, so much so that you swear he only has one setting in this film: whimsical. Gracey: [various scenes] Grand parties, dancing, laughter.../I really must show you./There's nothing to be afraid of./Yes, of course./And above all, hope. NC (vo): Even when he's saying really sad stuff, he seems bizarrely inspired by it. Gracey: These walls are filled with so many memories. Some of them...painful. NC (as Gracey): You can tell by the smile on my face. [Smiles] I'm so upset. Gracey: Elizabeth. Hers is the story that haunts these walls. NC (vo, as Gracey): You see, a long time ago, she... [Instead, the film cuts to the kids following the ghost orb.] Oh! I guess we're not doing that then. Odd transition. [normal] The kids follow the flaming Smurf testicle deeper into the house where they come across a picture of a woman that, of course, looks just like their mom. Ezra: What are you doing here? You're not supposed to be up here. This is unspeakable! Unspeakable! NC: [As Ezra; mimicking Vizzini from The Princess Bride] Inconceivable, even! [Speaks normally and raises his hand] Come on, high-five. You knew that was coming, come on, give me a high-five. Actually put your hand on the computer screen and give me a high-five. Come on, high-five. High-five me, bro, high-five. If you actually do it, I will be concerned about you. NC (vo): But Zod enters the room and they tell them to hide. Ramsley: The children are not in their room. Emma: Children? What children? Ramsley: The children she wasn't supposed to bring, along with that brainless husband of hers. NC: [As Ramsley, while trilling his R's] Those rascally rapscallions really ruffle my ridges! Ramsley: If I had to listen to another word from that insufferable fool, I think I would've burst. Ezra: Of course, sir. What a fool! NC (vo, as Ramsley): I'll be the only one tasting the scenery, thank you. Ramsley: The final arrangements have been made. Nothing further will interfere with the master's plan. NC (vo, as Ramsley): Now if you'll excuse me, my monster from his slab began to rise (reference to the song "Monster Mash"). NC (vo): Meanwhile, Murphy stumbles across another big surprise: [Jim's reflection on the mirror has his face heavily scarred and rocky.] Terrible CG that could've easily been done with makeup! NC (vo, as Jim): Hey, Dreamworks is the only company that gets to turn me into a computer-generated jackass. NC (vo): He then comes across Madame Leota, who if you remember from the ride, was played by the same actress who played Maleficent and Cinderella's Stepmother. So, obviously, they had to get somebody just as dignified to play the-- [Leota's actress is revealed to be Jennifer Tilly.] Oh, are you fucking kidding me? Madame Leota: There is great evil in this house. A devil's curse, it seeks to destroy you. NC: Okay, look, I have nothing against Jennifer Tilly. She's funny, she's talented, and...surprisingly random at Goddess of Poker. [A picture of Tilly playing poker is shown briefly.] But this is meant for a dignified voice. Every time I hear her, I keep expecting her to get legal advice from Jim Carrey! Madame Leota: And lead us through this stormy night... NC (vo): She then lifts him up into the air with a bunch of instruments because...really, no reason except it was on the ride. NC (as Jim): I'm trying to out-Tucker Chris Tucker! Announcer (voiced by Malcolm): Coming to the big screen, Walt Disney Pictures proudly presents...Gargoyles. From the studio that put [Images of] Eddie Murphy in The Haunted Mansion, Keira Knightley as a pirate, and Mila Kunis as the Wicked Witch, we present another phenomenal miscasting with... [cut to] Kanye West as Goliath. "Kanye" Goliath (played by Malcolm): Yeah! I'm stone by day, and batshit crazy monster by night! Also, I'm apparently in a movie! Announcer: Because you'll love our film versions of [posters for...] Cinderella and Beauty and the Beast, even though we already have film versions of [posters for animated versions of...] Cinderella and Beauty and the Beast... "Kanye" Goliath: Why they do that shit? [A hand tries to reach out to him offscreen, but he brushes it off.] Announcer: We bring you another misunderstanding of source material, by casting Ellen DeGeneres as Elisa Maza. "Kanye" Goliath: Bitch, who the fuck are you?! Ellen (played by Tamara): Zing! I'm your love interest. "Kanye" Goliath: Say what, you clam chowder cracker?! Ellen: Don't worry. I've seen worse. I dated Anne Heche. [to the audience] That's an old joke, kids. If you don't get it, ask your parents. 'Course if you're watching this, you are your parents. [chuckles] Okay. Boring voice from offscreen: Not so fast. Announcer: With Kevin Costner as the villainous Xanatos. Xanatos: I am Xenatos. "Kanye" Goliath and Ellen: XANATOS! Xanatos: I don't care. I have sent out my robotic army. [brief shot of the robots over the green screen Chicago night sky]. If you wish to save the people, you will have to fly up there and stop them. "Kanye" Goliath: Bitch that fuck! I don't do any flying. Unless I have a crown of thorns or a halo! Ellen: What are you 'spossed to do? Let all those people die? Xanatos: Maybe. "Kanye" Goliath: Shut up, Postman! I can buy you like my wife! Xanatos: I am Xanax-tos. Xanatos: I don't care. I didn't watch the show. "Kanye" Goliath: These wings don't have feathers on them... Beyonce should be in this role... Also... Ellen: [laughs and smiles] You're welcome, America... Imma let you finish, and he said... Xanatos: ...like Professor X... it's not X Anatos... it should really have a Z... Announcer: Gargoyles. Coming soon to a theatre near... [punching sounds are heard] Hey, let go of me! Kanye: Imma let you finish, but I want you to know that [title card for] Bonkers is one of the greatest shows of all time! And we deserve a movie about a cartoon character and a cop! Announcer: We have two! [The covers for Who Framed Roger Rabbit and Cool World are shown.] Kanye: We need three! Ellen: Hey, you wanna hear about the show I'm producing that's gonna bomb? Kanye: Bitch, don't make me chop you up and smoke you! Costner: I am Santa Hose. NC (vo): So Gracey continues to tell Murphy's wife about his dead wife, claiming the events happened to his grandfather instead of to himself. Gracey: And he loved her more than life itself. But they were from different worlds, and couldn't be together. NC (vo): Hey, hey! We tip-toed towards racism not existing in Princess and the Frog, we can do the same thing here. Megan: Dad! Dad! NC (vo): So the kids meet up with Murphy and try to find out what to do. Madame Leota: For the truth to be known, you must find the key. Jim: What are you talking about, ball lady? What key? Madame Leota: Enter the tomb under the great dead oak, and travel down deep under the ground, and there you will find the key that must be found. NC (vo): Okay, where's this clause that says that side characters must speak in bullshit riddles and rhymes? Why can't they just say "go fucking here" and "do fucking that" because "fucking this"? A fun scavenger hunt is one thing, but when lives are on the line, skip the Frank Gorshin cocktease! [Ezra and Emma lead Jim and the kids out of the mansion by riding on a coach with a skeleton horse.] The servants help them on their quest and suddenly turn blue because... NC: Pac-Man ate the corner pellet, I don't know. NC (vo): And they come across more spooks recreating the ride. Michael: Dad? Jim: Yes, son? Michael: I see dead people. NC: Hey, that doesn't date this at all. Why don't you just throw in a "getting jiggy" reference while you're at it? Jim: [from an earlier scene] He wants to try to get jiggy with my wife? Ezra: Pretty much. NC: Why the hell that? Did I also forget to mention that you are the Weakest Link, Houston, we have a problem, and somebody just did a great cave drawing of a buffalo? Gracey: This was to have been her wedding dress. It would've been lovelier still if she'd ever had a chance to wear it. NC (vo, as Sara): Uh, that's nice, Mr. Gracey, but we've been talking about this for three hours now. Can we finally change the subject? Megan: He was willing to throw everything away for love. Jim: Well, now he's broke, dead and cursed. Nice move. [Steps on something messy, with an audible sound effect] Crap! NC (vo, as Jim): I stepped in a 40s cartoon sound effect. Singing Busts: When the crypt doors creak and the tombstones quake... NC (vo): And as is typical of bad adaptations, they take one of the coolest parts of the original source and make it easily the most annoying part of the entire movie. Jim: It's by the... Singing Busts: By the light, by the light, by the light, of the silvery moon... Jim: I gotta help my wife. She'll be-- Singing Busts: Coming round the mountain when she comes, when she comes... NC: Are you laughing yet? No? Fucking more! Singing Busts: Where's the key, where's the key, where's the beautiful key? Find the key, find the key, oh, how happy you'll be. Jim: The key is in the mausoleum! Singing Busts: You left your key... Doug: Oh, your two-year-old is laughing, but you're not. Jim, Rob and Barney: But you're not! Doug: Unless you're smoking a gigantic brick of pot. Jim, Rob and Barney: Brick of pot! Doug: We're annoying and obnoxious and you probably should've shot us, please don't hold back then and give us what you got! Jim, Rob and Barney: What you got! Doug, Jim, Rob and Barney: Thank you, Gooooooooood! Megan: It's a warning. Jim: How do you know that? Megan: I studied Latin for three years, Dad. You thought it was dumb, remember? NC (vo): Gee, a daughter who speaks Latin and a son with a Houdini poster? NC: Stop! The realistic kid measurements are off the chart! NC (vo): The son stays behind as the daughter goes with him down below. [Jim opens a coffin to reveal a rotting corpse.] The shield! It's the second marker! [The zombie suddenly comes to life.] But it's guarded by the Walking Dull, causing them to drop the key. Jim: Did you get the key? Megan: I'm looking, I'm looking! Jim: I have everything completely under control. NC (vo, as Jim): And I'm not just saying that because every person who has ever said that in the history of mankind has always meant what the exact opposite reaction! NC: [As Megan] Oh, my God! Creepy creatures are actually in front of me and not CG! This is so rare in this movie! NC (vo, normal): Come on, can't you CG in Gazoo or the Twilight baby or something? Jim: Michael, open the door! NC (vo): Ah, there you go. Fake CG spiders. God, this film felt naked for a second. Megan: Open the door or I'll kill you! Jim: Just open the door, please! Open the door right now! NC (vo, as Michael): Sorry, I need the customary minute-and-a-half to perform the "overcoming my fears" cliche. Minute 22, minute 23...oh, I want to end this movie. [Michael eventually opens the door, allowing Jim and Megan to get out] So they seem to have the key... Michael: You got the key? NC (vo): Or do they? Jim: There, I got it. NC (vo): Oh, I guess they do. NC: [confused] That was needed. NC (vo): And Murphy discovers that Zod is the one who killed Gracey's wife years ago. So he throws Murphy out of the house and locks up the kids in a trunk. You might be wondering, where the hell's the mother in all of this? Well, naturally, she's still listening to Gracey's story this whole time! Christ, lady! You give more time to this guy than Peter Jackson does to The Hobbit! Gracey: Do you believe that love is about second chances? Sara: Yes. Gracey: [Suddenly becomes agitated] Don't you recognize me at all? Sara: Mr. Gracey? Gracey: I thought certainly bringing you back to Gracey Manor would help you. NC (vo): So he tells her that she's the spirit of his lost love, but she has no memory whatsoever. Gracey: It can't be her. Ramsley: It is her, sir. The gypsy woman prophesied her return. Gracey: But she doesn't remember. Ramsley: In time, she will, sir. I assure you, she will. NC (vo, as Ramsley): She'll remember after I beat it into her. Sara: I'm not Elizabeth! Ramsley: We wouldn't want anything to happen to the children now, would we? [Reveals the children locked in the trunk] NC (vo): So he tells her that unless she marries Gracey to lift the curse, he'll...I don't know, send her kids through baggage claim...and she begrudgingly agrees. But Gracey is confused by her crying while walking down the aisle. Ramsley: Tears of joy. NC: [As Ramsley] You can trust your creepy, dark-eyed, whispery-voiced darling. Oooooh! NC (vo): But the dignified Madame Leota rolls in like a hamster ball and gives Murphy the motivation not to give up. Jim: Hold on! Madame Leota: With what? NC (vo, as Jim): I'm finally gonna follow through on my "loving the car" joke! [Jim gets out of his car and runs into the mansion.] Only to have no reaction, thus not following through on my "loving the car" joke. NC: [Confused] Gutterball! Ramsley: Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God... NC (vo): [Laughing] Is Howling Dog an accent? NC: [As Ramsley] We are gathered here today to celebrate this... [Howls like a dog] NC (vo): So Murphy hurries to save the kids. Jim: Michael! Megan! NC (vo): So he defeats the knights...yeah, I believe it, too...and gets the kids out of the trunk to help him save his wife. Jim: Yeah, I got a few objections! [Embraces Sara, before telling Gracey about Ramsley's schemes.] Elizabeth didn't kill herself, he did it! He's been lying to you all along! Ramsley: That is absurd. NC: [As Ramsley] Totally absurd. It makes me want to laugh. [Does the Woody Woodpecker laugh in Ramsley's voice] Ramsley: Damn you! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!! NC (vo): Uh-oh! Zod's demon army has come to burn our heroes up! [The fiery dragon grabs Ramsley and begins to drag him away to Hell.] Or they confusingly decide to take him instead because...he said the "D" word? So the spirits of "Do You Really Give a Shit" come in for do-you-really-need-a-reason and take Zod away because would you even listen if I told you? [Ramsley is dragged into Hell forever.] Oh, God, what kind of world is this where Terence Stamp goes to Hell but Eddie Murphy is untouched? Michael: Mom, what's wrong? Are you all right? NC (vo): But it seems the poison has taken its effect on his wife, leading to Murphy's most genuinely, authentic, phoned-in performance he has yet given. Jim: Sara! Sara, come on, please! Sara! Sara, I love you! Sara, please, I love you so much. NC: [As Jim] Come on, honey. We had dinner reservations, Olive Garden...it was so mildly annoying to cancel. NC (vo): But the radioactive Na'vi turd arrives again, possessing her with the spirit of Elizabeth, who brings Murphy's wife back to life. Sara: I thought I'd lost you, too. Jim: I'm back, Sara. I'm back. NC (vo, as Jim): At least until Pluto Nash. Then it's a long, uphill climb from there. NC (vo): Thus, the curse is lifted and all the spirits are freed at last. Ezra: What's all this? Emma: I don't know what we'll need. Ezra: What are you talking about? We're going to Heaven. You can't take it with you. Emma: The hell I can't! [Gives the suitcases to Ezra.] NC (vo, as Ezra): Don't you know? You never mess with a Sicilian when death is on the line! Madame Leota: Angels in Heaven, together at last. The tale is well-ended for those who have passed. NC (vo): Now that I agree with. The only people who'll leave this film happy are those who are dead. Megan: Mom, Leota won't shut up. Michael: Are we there yet? NC (vo): So I guess not all the souls were taken. The really annoying ones were left behind. [The singing busts are shown to be riding on the back of the car.] And for some reason, the family decided to keep them because... NC: Wouldn't you also want to take them home? It'd be like having a hearing aid that's also a fire alarm. [A photo of a man putting fire alarms on his ears is shown briefly.] Nothing but pleasant sounds all year round, which is definitely not what was in this film! NC (vo): What should have been a film on par with the creativity and fun of Pirates of the Caribbean instead turns out to be a series of performances, effects and story threads all set on autopilot. Yeah, everything feels half-assed with no passion put into it. And it’s really a shame. There’s a lot of possibilities with The Haunted Mansion. Hell, a lot of the characters on the ride already seem to have stories set up, so why make up this one with Eddie Murphy as the focus? With all the reboots that Disney is doing recently, this is one that desperately needs it. I mean, come on, couldn’t you see this as, like, an animated film? Like the same people who did Frozen or Wreck-It Ralph work on the story and the look? It’d be amazing. This is still an incredible opportunity waiting to happen. But, until then, if ever, this is all we have: a wasted opportunity of creativity and imagination, leaving little to no impression whatsoever. Ain’t no fucking way I’m hitchhiking a ride on this wagon anytime soon. NC: But on the plus side, I think it perfected my whispery-voiced butler. [Imitates Ramsley] Sara Evers. [Howls like a dog; several dogs howl in the background] I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it so you don't have to. Channel Awesome Tagline: Ramsley: That is absurd.
  • The film did not perform very well at the box office. Having been made on an estimated budget of $90,000,000, it earned less than $76,000,000 at movie theaters in North America. It earned a further $106,000,000 in the rest of the world. The movie also received largely negative reviews. The Haunted Mansion was rated PG by the Motion Picture Association of America for its subject matter, some frightening images and some use of bad language.
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