Dork is published by Slave Labor Graphics. Price per issue is $2.95.
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| - Dork is published by Slave Labor Graphics. Price per issue is $2.95.
- Dork was a term used to describe someone who was considered foolish or idiotic.
- Dork along with Doof, was a Goblin guard who watced over the three dwarf prisoners Gloin, Bombur, and Thorin. He was an aggressive Goblin, and got into a fight with Doof over a sandwich. In the fight, Dork is knocked unconscious by Doof. Dork also was one of the goblins to participate in the Battle of Five Armies, where he was killed. NOTE- Dork only appears in the play adaptation of the Hobbit, and is not to be considered Canon.
- All incidents of dorkiness are caused by head trauma. This may happen in an infinite variety of unlikely but nevertheless hilarious ways. For example:
* Subject steps in a bucket of washing water that has become moist on the bottom, slides sideways, tips over a chair, hits his or her head on it.
* Subject drops a banana peel in the kitchen, slips on it. Catches the edge of a countertop, but sets foot accidentally in a bucket of washing water that has become moist on the bottom. Slides sideways and becomes entangled in a chair, which falls over. Subject tumbles down the adjacent stairwell and whams his or her head on the side-table at the bottom.
* Subject slips on a banana peel and faceplants.
* Subject slips on a device designed to destroy the equilibrium of one who stands o
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| abstract
| - Dork is published by Slave Labor Graphics. Price per issue is $2.95.
- Dork was a term used to describe someone who was considered foolish or idiotic.
- All incidents of dorkiness are caused by head trauma. This may happen in an infinite variety of unlikely but nevertheless hilarious ways. For example:
* Subject steps in a bucket of washing water that has become moist on the bottom, slides sideways, tips over a chair, hits his or her head on it.
* Subject drops a banana peel in the kitchen, slips on it. Catches the edge of a countertop, but sets foot accidentally in a bucket of washing water that has become moist on the bottom. Slides sideways and becomes entangled in a chair, which falls over. Subject tumbles down the adjacent stairwell and whams his or her head on the side-table at the bottom.
* Subject slips on a banana peel and faceplants.
* Subject slips on a device designed to destroy the equilibrium of one who stands on it, and faceplants in the concrete of a skateboard park.
* Subject falls asleep at the wheel and nods forward, triggering the airbag. Boooosh!
* Subject is accidentally mistaken for a crash-test dummy.
* Subject is exposed to first-aid training for third graders. Such training should only be given to schoolchildren at an adequate level, i.e. first graders.
* Subject lives around metapointy(TM) objects.
* Subject takes a long dive into a shallow swimming-pool.
* Subject takes a long drop into a shallow gene-pool.
* Subject is cranially molested by a predatory dolphin.
* Subject is hit over the head with a frozen turkey. For some pointy-headed kids even repeated taps on the forehead with the middle finger are enough to cause self-inflicted terminal dorkiness
- Dork along with Doof, was a Goblin guard who watced over the three dwarf prisoners Gloin, Bombur, and Thorin. He was an aggressive Goblin, and got into a fight with Doof over a sandwich. In the fight, Dork is knocked unconscious by Doof. Dork also was one of the goblins to participate in the Battle of Five Armies, where he was killed. NOTE- Dork only appears in the play adaptation of the Hobbit, and is not to be considered Canon.
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