abstract
| - Object Class: Keter Special Containment Procedures: Due to the apparent omnipresence of SCP-078-J-1, researchers have constructed several safe houses for refugees. These safe houses are to be equipped with a large memetic deterrent consisting of a sign that states "NO GURLZ ALLOWD!!" and various drawings of cool boy stuff like dragons. No pink is to be allowed into these safe houses. Description: SCP-078-J is a highly contagious biohazard spread through physical contact with SCP-078-J-1 (Especially on the lips!!). Although the properties of SCP-078-J are not fully understood, it is well known for causing various cases of yuckiness, bad smells, and immediate death. SCP-078-J-1 is a malevolent creature that typically inhabits an area colloquially known as the "playground". There are several different versions of SCP-078-1 that will wander this area at any given time. Current research performed by Junior Researcher James1 has pointed towards SCP-078-J-1 possibly being extraterrestrial in origin. That would certainly explain why they don't like Power Rangers. Prolonged exposure to SCP-078-J carriers results in an expansion of the larynx, a development of the sexual organs, an increase in bodily growth, and the sprouting of various hairs around the body, as well as a marked fondness towards SCP-078-J-1. Researchers agree this is totally gross. Footnotes 1. Junior Researcher James has been commended for his quick thinking during incident 536-J-3, during which a group of SCP-078-J-1 surrounded him in an attempt to perform a "makeover". Researcher James cleverly reached a finger into his nose and pulled out a large booger, with which he fended off SCP-078-J-1.
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