Helen is the unappreciated librarian who often gets mistaken for objects such as brooms or toilet brushes, leading her to become angry when people ignore or cut her off. Her catchphrase is "Quiet down!". She seems to have high levels of testosterone, which is balanced out by taking female hormone drugs (which Vice Principal Prozackian was given when it was believed that the hormone drugs were steroids). Helen is skinny but is considered unattractive in relation to Miracle. In one episode, it was revealed because of her extreme loneliness she has a habit of falling in love with inanimate objects and lives with a lot of cats. She was an alumnus of Knob Haven High School, where she and Sue formed a musical duo, and she was obese back then.
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