About: Neil Kinnock   Sponge Permalink

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Pinocchio/Neil Kinnock (b. 1940/1942) was a Welsh Labour politican who was Head of the Opposition from 1983 to 1992.

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  • Neil Kinnock
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  • Pinocchio/Neil Kinnock (b. 1940/1942) was a Welsh Labour politican who was Head of the Opposition from 1983 to 1992.
  • Kinnock's other policies included compulsory regional accents and failing to get elected, the latter of which he clung to right till the end. Unfortunately as time went by he lost touch with his origins and began to believe he was actually maybe properly really going to be an actual literal proper Prime Minister. After 22 years as an MP, he was delighted when the Conservative Party crumbled into leaderless disarray with the destruction of Margaret Thatcher when her head was cut off by Ben Elton.
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  • Kinnock's other policies included compulsory regional accents and failing to get elected, the latter of which he clung to right till the end. Unfortunately as time went by he lost touch with his origins and began to believe he was actually maybe properly really going to be an actual literal proper Prime Minister. After 22 years as an MP, he was delighted when the Conservative Party crumbled into leaderless disarray with the destruction of Margaret Thatcher when her head was cut off by Ben Elton. So delighted was the Kinnock that he failed to register his own levels of twattishness. He famously danced about at a rally, shouting "We're all shite! We're all shite!" While he was thus occupied, the Tories, quickly installing their own pretend leader (see John Major), were reelected yet again in 1992. Silence hung over the country for many days. Neil Kinnock sneaked out of the back exit of the country and became a European Commissioner, a position he insists he has occupied since leaving university. If confronted with pictures of his time in the Labour Party, he flatly denies that they are of him. He was recently made Baron Kinnock on the strict understanding that he make an arsehole of himself again for the entertainment of the nation. It's thought this may involve a fistfight with Robert Kilroy-Silk.
  • Pinocchio/Neil Kinnock (b. 1940/1942) was a Welsh Labour politican who was Head of the Opposition from 1983 to 1992.
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