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- The University of Illinois at Urbana–Champaign is a public research university in the state of Illinois in the United States. Dr. Mike Branton attended this university. (SGA: "The DVD Collection 89")
- The University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, commonly known as UofIwhytheheckisthereaChair?, or (for Asians) United of Indians and United of Chinese, is the only worthwhile entity of the UI school system. The other schools (springfield, chicago) are meant to comfort those who couldn't make it into UofI and provide them with a false reality of campus. The site of the campus sits atop an ancient indian burial ground, which is the reason for the school's beloved mascot, Chief Illiniwek. Most students attend UIUC after ruining their father's Porsche, failing interviews with Princeton, turning their home into a brothel, or becoming a Scientologist. Once they have failed out of UIUC, they go on to attend Parkland College, an institution of somewhat higher prestige, located in the same communi
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- The University of Illinois at Urbana–Champaign is a public research university in the state of Illinois in the United States. Dr. Mike Branton attended this university. (SGA: "The DVD Collection 89")
- The University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, commonly known as UofIwhytheheckisthereaChair?, or (for Asians) United of Indians and United of Chinese, is the only worthwhile entity of the UI school system. The other schools (springfield, chicago) are meant to comfort those who couldn't make it into UofI and provide them with a false reality of campus. The site of the campus sits atop an ancient indian burial ground, which is the reason for the school's beloved mascot, Chief Illiniwek. Most students attend UIUC after ruining their father's Porsche, failing interviews with Princeton, turning their home into a brothel, or becoming a Scientologist. Once they have failed out of UIUC, they go on to attend Parkland College, an institution of somewhat higher prestige, located in the same community. The university is most well known for its Morrow Plots which were the first experimental opium fields in the United States. The most common moniker for UIUC is University of Illinois - Under Construction, please remember to pronounce the 's' at the end of Illinois. The fact that the university is constantly under construction in at least seven places is not disputed and is possibly responsible for many of the "late nighters" students experience, although it is entirely possible that these are caused by promiscuous students talking about how sexy each other's tractors are. It is also common for undergraduate students to harass professors about joining their research in teleportation (not quantum teleportation, the Star Trek kind). Evidently we do that here at UIUC. Alumni from UIUC include Hugh Hefner, Moses, Jerry Colangelo and Hanky the Christmas Poo. The university is also well known for graduating people who watch movies for a living.
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