Hastings, New Zealand, is a moderate-size (by New Zealand standards) "city" near the east coast of the North Island inland from the port of Napier. It is the headquarters of the Hastings District, a large area encompassing, since 1989, the former Hastings City and Hawke's Bay County.
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| - Hastings, New Zealand, is a moderate-size (by New Zealand standards) "city" near the east coast of the North Island inland from the port of Napier. It is the headquarters of the Hastings District, a large area encompassing, since 1989, the former Hastings City and Hawke's Bay County.
- Once upon a time 200 years ago Captain James Cook was sailing around New Zealand wondering how to get home when a bunch of Flaxmerians kidnapped his Tahitian translator (to convert Cook's slurred drunken words into English) and kept him as their own, the population grew rapidly, by one person that year. Since then, the boy is immortal and lives today to translate tourists who get drunk on Hawke's Bay's industrial-strength wine into English or Bahasa Malay. White people came to Hawkes Bay trying to rescue the Tahitian boy, but got drunk, attacked by the Hawke's Bay Earthquake and forgot about technology and reverted to their primitave instincts. Descendants of these few white people are still around and their main diet is booze.
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| - Hastings, New Zealand, is a moderate-size (by New Zealand standards) "city" near the east coast of the North Island inland from the port of Napier. It is the headquarters of the Hastings District, a large area encompassing, since 1989, the former Hastings City and Hawke's Bay County.
- Once upon a time 200 years ago Captain James Cook was sailing around New Zealand wondering how to get home when a bunch of Flaxmerians kidnapped his Tahitian translator (to convert Cook's slurred drunken words into English) and kept him as their own, the population grew rapidly, by one person that year. Since then, the boy is immortal and lives today to translate tourists who get drunk on Hawke's Bay's industrial-strength wine into English or Bahasa Malay. White people came to Hawkes Bay trying to rescue the Tahitian boy, but got drunk, attacked by the Hawke's Bay Earthquake and forgot about technology and reverted to their primitave instincts. Descendants of these few white people are still around and their main diet is booze.
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