| abstract
| - An internet series following the villainous organisation, Coyle Command, in its ongoing mission to destroy their arch enemies, COMMANDO and take over the world. Which would be going a lot smoother if the number of competant operatives couldn't be counted on a single hand. Existing as a Facebook page for a year or so before hitting Youtube, Coyle Command was inspired by the portrayal of Corporate Commander from The Angry Joe Show as well as Cobra Commander's presidential campaign from Attack of the Show. Though obviously borrowing a number of ideas and whatnot from GI. Joe, the series ultimately does its own thing (The creator, Kid Sideburns has admitted to forgetting his character is an Expy). The 'protagonist' is of course Coyle Commander, often helped (or severely irritated) by his assistant, Anni Hilator. The group also participates in a rivalry with the New Villain Order. See them here:
* Arch Enemy: COMMANDO, who are ,presumably, a GI Joe knock-off.
* Acting for Two: Aside from Chrome Dome, Anni and Agent B, all characters so far are portrayed by Kid Sideburns. This has the unfortunate sideaffect of making some characters look far more similar than preferable.
* Amoral Attorney: Played with Vic Valhalla. He didn't know Blitzer was actually guilty, but he doesn't seem to mind.
* Awesome McCoolname: Vic Valhalla.
* Badass: Ensign O'Connell is one of very few competant Coyle Troopers.
* Badass Shades: O'Connell is never seen without them.
* Bad Boss: Anni has to pay to work for Coyle Commander, and takes a lot of physical abuse.
* Beyond the Impossible: Blitzer claims this of Anni's stupidity. In terms of intelligence, he is a fly struggle for life while stuck in the drying cememnt between two bricks.
* Big Bad Duumvirate:
* Anni appears to be under the impression he is the second in command. He's not.
* The real second in command, Countess Crossland, is so far unseen because she uses the group's resources to fund expensive vacations.
* Due to a small fiasco on Facebook, she has been replaced by Harvey the Super Toaster. Yes.
* Blatant Lies: In Coyle Command Assassinates Batman. They do not assassinate Batman.
* Blessed with Suck: Anni has been upgraded into a super soldier cyborg. His Facebook bio lists 'Poor Eyesight' and 'Extra Sensetive to Pain' as some of his abilities.
* Butt Monkey: Anni.
* Canon Immigrant: Chrome Dome started out life on the New Villain Order before becoming a part of the 'Command's roster.
* Catch Phrase: Coyle-lalalalalala!
* Cloning Blues: Technically not a clone, but Chrome Dome manages to accidentally create a vague copy of Anni out of random animal genetics. Dissatisfied, he sends it off into an empty Void.
* Cloudcuckoolander: Anni, again.
* Colonel Badass: Colonel Blitzer.
* Crossover: Is responsible for recent plot points in the New Villain Order.
* Cyborg: Coyle Commander's assistant Jan is upgraded into one after trying to take over the show (the procedure was intended to kill him). Despite being touted as a super soldier and having computer programs running through his head, this hasn't made him any more useful.
* Early Installment Weirdness: Coyle Commander once opened an episode declaring 'Hail Coyle', accompanied by saluting with his hand in a C shape. He has yet to try the former again, apparently on the grounds that it is not as fun as saying 'Coyle-lalala.' The official Facebook page also still lists 'COYEEEEEEEEEEL' as the battlecry, as it was before they started makinng videos.
* Expy:
* The organisation in general is a parody of Cobra Command.
* Coyle Commander - Cobra Commander.
* Anni - Destro
* Countess Crossland - The Baroness.
* COMMANDO - GI. Joe.
* A bit different. Vic Valhalla - Phoenix Wright.
* Eyepatch of Power: Colonel Blitzer.
* Even Evil Has Standards: Nobody but O'Connell thinks selling issues of One Moment in Time is acceptable. The video's description even urges you not to agree with him.
* Fail O'Suckyname: Anni sounds an awful lot like a girls name.
* Fate Worse Than Death: Chrome Dome sends his Anni clone to the Void. Then does the same with its children...before killing them.
* From Nobody to Nightmare: Coyle Commander apparently built up his organisation from a laundromat.
* General Failure: True to his source, Coyle Commander isn't a very good leader.
* General Ripper: CC often seems more interested in conquest than anything else.
* Hero Antagonist: COMMANDO.
* Jerkass: Coyle Commander.
* Kaiju: Lord Sock from 'The Good News, The Bad News, and the Godzilla Sock. It is NOT a sock puppet, but it does happen to look like one.
* Mad Scientist:
* Coyle Command's Head of Science has seen some rotation.
* Dr. Vendor: Unseen.
* Dr. Vorn: Fanboy of his predecessor.
* Chrome Dome: Creation of Dr. Vorn.
* Machinima: Briefly in 'Adventures in Cloning.' Specifically the Spore Creature Creator.
* Minion with an F In Evil: Half the time, Anni doesn't even seem to know where he is, let alone the assistant to a conquest hungry super villain.
* Moral Event Horizon: Ensign O'Connell goes through this in-universe when he tries to sell the comic book One Moment in Time. Thankfully he comes to his senses in The Stinger.
* Mooks: Coyle Troopers. Ensign O'Connell is one of few to apparently survive more than a few missions.
* Names to Run Away From Really Fast: Subverted. The Commander's assistant is named Annihilator, which is shortened to Anni.
* No Budget: The Commander's mask is a freakin' tea towel!
* Not-So-Harmless Villain: Perhaps it wasn't actually the Commander's doing, but they did manage to take out their competition (albiet briefly) and take over what remained through Chrome Dome.
* Sexbot: The Commander is very irritated to find that some of the Troopers figure this is the best use of the Android Program...and them quietly asks Anni is the Science Department have finished making his yet.
* The Blank: Coyle Commander, of course.
* Shout-Out: Vic Valhalla is a rather obvious one to the Ace Attorney series.
* The Cameo: Batman.
* The Chew Toy: Anni doesn't get paid, is regularly abused by the Commander, is universally despised by the CC crew, and their in-house dentists apparently want to sell his teeth. Fortunately, he only occasionally seems to realise this.
* The Dragon: Anni by default.
* O'Connell seems to fit the bill a little better.
* Too Dumb to Live: Anni is DUMB!
* Show Within a Show: Coymercials. So far they have mostly tried to sell the Austrlian drink Solo, but have also attempted to sell copies of One Moment in Time.
* Underwater Base: Though you'd need to be told in order to know that.
* Unfortunate Name: Named after Destro (Short for Destroyer of Worlds), Anni's name (Short for Annihilator, or Anni Hilator) is not quite as intimidating.
* Vitriolic Best Buds: Type One, Anni doesn't seem to be aware that the Commander despises him.
* Vocal Evolution: Though his appearances was very brief, Vorn's first appearance had him speaking in either no accent at all, or the same as Coyle Commander. In his second appearance, he regularly slips between a shriek and casual tone.
* You Have Outlived Your Usefullness: Dr. Vorn is no longer needed once Chrome Dome can unambigiously work for the Commander.
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