abstract
| - Stick Figures in Spaaaaaace is the first part of a recurring stick-figure storyline starring alternate-dimensional versions of the main comic's protagonists: Science Officer Riff and Captain Torg, "intrepid space freelancers". It ran for seven days, starting on 16 May 2006 and ending on 22 May 2006. Before the story opens, Riff has falsely informed Torg of a "job" available, hoping to trick him into flying the ship to Planet Sagev (that is, "Vegas" spelled backwards) for debauchery. The plan is flawed for several reasons: Sagev is their home port anyway, and their navigator is worse than useless without her glasses on. Light-years from Sagev, the characters find themselves entering a pun-field. The pun-field is escaped with minimal damage, and Riff discovers that navigation has been controlled via an android protocol. Torg and Riff hence set out to identify the android member of their crew. Polling the crew reveals an overwhelming majority believe the android to be Juan, who denies the allegations and instead suggests the square-headed Ensign Bandroid. Despite the fact that Bandroid has been speaking using only the words "zero" and "one", Juan is paid no heed. Torg and Riff determine that Juan is not an android by means of a "Scananator", meanwhile dissecting his spaghetti-and-meatball lunch. They are called to the bridge, where Doctor McTraitor has Ensign Bandroid (revealed to be the android after all) holding the bridge crew at gunpoint. McTraitor orders Bandroid to "shoot the first one that makes a noise"; the latter then shoots the nav computer when it reports the completion of processing. McTraitor's clarification that he meant the first human to make a noise gives him the unenviable distinction of being the first human to make a noise, so Bandroid shoots him. With the mutiny ended, the crew rejoices. However, the nav-com having been destroyed, they are left "space lost". The story continues in Stick-Figures in Spaaaaaace 2.
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