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| - Player: Hello, what's your job? Junior Cadet Bertol: One of upmost importance. Player: Which is? A. Ring of charos (a) on or off, H.A.M. robes off A-2. Ring of charos (a) on, H.A.M. robes off A-2a. Do not use Charm A-2b. Use Charm A-2b becomes B-2 A-3. Ring of charos (a) off, H.A.M. robes off B. Ring of charos (a) on or off, H.A.M. robes on B-2. H.A.M. Dialogue b-1. H.A.M.? b-2. Why are you here? b-2a. Support his cause b-2b. Disagree with him b-3. What have you done? b-4. Finishing up A. Junior Cadet Bertol: It's so incredibly top-secret that I'd have to kill you if you found out. Ring of charos (a) on, H.A.M. robes off Ring of charos (a) off, H.A.M. robes off Select an Option A-2a. 1. Best I not prod further, then. A-2b. 2. I can keep a secret. (Charm.) 1. Best I not prod further, then. Player: Best I not prod further, then. Dialogue ends. 2. I can keep a secret. (Charm.) Player: I can keep a secret. Junior Cadet Bertol: Very well. I'm a member of H.A.M. Skip to H.A.M. Dialogue Player: I can keep a secret. Junior Cadet Bertol: The knowledge alone would fry your little brain. Player: I doubt it. Junior Cadet Bertol: It so would! Player: Wouldn't. Junior Cadet Bertol: Would. Player: Wouldn't. Junior Cadet Bertol: Would. Player: Wouldn't times ten! Junior Cadet Bertol: Would times infinity! Player: Prove it. Junior Cadet Bertol: Okay, I'm under cover as...ah you almost had me, there. Player: Ah, so close! Dialogue ends. Junior Cadet Bertol: Well, I see from your clothes that you're a member of H.A.M. I am too. To H.A.M. Dialogue Select an Option b-1. 1. What's H.A.M.? b-2. 2. What's H.A.M. got to do with this command centre? b-2a. 1. I wish you good luck. b-2b. 2. How awful. b-3. 3. What have you done while undercover? b-4. 4. I've heard enough. 1. What's H.A.M.? Player: What's H.A.M.? Junior Cadet Bertol: It stands for 'Humans Against Monsters': a group keen on enforcing that humans are all that belongs on RuneScape. Back to H.A.M. Dialogue 2. What's H.A.M. got to do with this command centre? Player: What's H.A.M. got to do with this command centre? Junior Cadet Bertol: Open your eyes! It's crawling with all manner of disgusting creatures. At least they've got one thing right - humans are officers rather than grunts. Player: But what can H.A.M. do about it? Junior Cadet Bertol: My friend, I'm on a mission to stop it all - by any means necessary. Select an Option 1. I wish you good luck. Player: I wish you good luck. Junior Cadet Bertol: Thanks. I can assure you that I'll need no luck with the ingenuity of my plans. Back to H.A.M. Dialogue 2. How awful. Player: How awful. Junior Cadet Bertol: There's nothing awful about my mission. Player: I disagree. Give me one reason why I shouldn't head to an officer and tell them of your secret agenda. Junior Cadet Bertol: Do as you wish. He'll never believe some stranger over a cadet. Player: You mean junior cadet. Junior Cadet Bertol: How observant of you. Back to H.A.M. Dialogue 3. What have you done while undercover? Player: What have you done while undercover? Junior Cadet Bertol: Plenty! Spreading rumours, sabotaging special units; recently, I've hit upon mixing up the battle orders so commanders end up travelling to the wrong destinations! He he. Player: Cunning. Back to H.A.M. Dialogue 4. I've heard enough. Player: I've heard enough. Junior Cadet Bertol: Fine by me. Dialogue ends.
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