| abstract
| - You descend to Illinois below. Illinois Illinois, a major center of heavy industry, is a place rich in beauty and history as well. The north consists of prairies, bluffs, and historic river towns. The western part of the state is an abundant rural area rich in historic sites and great architecture. The central region was the home of Lincoln, and his presence is still felt. The south is a land of rolling hills and sparkling lakes. Chicago, blues capital of the world, is home to perhaps one of the most spectacular skylines in the world. Nightbeat has arrived. Nightbeat slouches down into Porsche 959 form. Time to roll. Barrage has arrived. Is at a gas station, filling up. That is to say, he has stuck the gas nozzle directly into his mouth, and is drinking out of it. Naturally, this is of some concern to the humans in the area. Americon is at a gas station, filling up. That is to say, he has stuck the gas nozzle directly into his mouth, and is drinking out of it. Naturally, this is of some concern to the humans in the area. Barrage crouches down and transforms into a tiny little beetle. Barrage is crawling along the streets happily, avoiding people that might step on him. What is he doing here? Looking at what to destroy of course! Terror, Death all those little details barely anyone by now pays attention to. Alright, perhaps they do wondering where he might strike next. But still, he crawls around near the gas station barking at Americon "Do you really have to do that?" Porche 959 is swerving a little as he drives down the highway. He's keeping it between the lines but barely. His radio is blasting some old blues music. Various cars honk at Nightbeat for his shoddy, shoddy driving, but he doesn't seem the care. off in the distance, he can see a gas station coming up. It can't hurt to top up... The puzzle pieces of Porsche 959 rearrange into the hard-boiled Autobot detective, Nightbeat! Nightbeat slouches down into Porsche 959 form. Time to roll. "GLARG GLARG GLARG!" Americon continues to guzzle down oil before he finally puts the nozzle back, wipes his chin, and sighs pleasantly. "Ahhhh. What? A talking insect!?" He stares incredulously at the little bug "Yes, I have to do that, I needed a quick pick-me-up!" Barrage grumbles and scutters away to the place where there are people, thanks to Americon here are none. And as he scuttles away he walks into a large crowd of people. Porsche 959 veers over toward the gas station, taking the turn way, way too quickly. He stops at a pump with a screech, leaving a black trail behind him. For a moment, he just sits there, as if he expects the pump to come to life and refuel him. Then, the car groans and transforms. An Autobot sits under the roof over the pumps, and he grumbles to himself as he fishes in subspace for his 'credit card' - stupid tiny pieces of plastic. Despite his excellent senses of vision and hearing, he does not yet notice the Decepticons or even that he has likely disturbed the humans around here. The puzzle pieces of Porsche 959 rearrange into the hard-boiled Autobot detective, Nightbeat! Americon peers over to his right, and is alarmed to see a pair of legs there. He blinks a few times. "Wow, I must be seeing things! Legs do not generally appear at gas stations! What sorcery is this!?" Unbeknownst to him, however, an attractive Earth female is watching him from around the gas station operator's booth. "Mommy, mommy. A metalic bug!" A girl shouts to her mother as she points at Barrage. "Shhh." Barrage whispers at the same time her mother replies, "Don't be silly. Bugs are bugs, not metalic." Feeling agitated Barrage transforms to his robot form and leans in close to the woman who does not believe in metalic bugs. METALIC BUGS! "Boo!" Barrage breaks out and the whole crowd begins to scream in terror. Emitting something like laughing, Barrage begins to discharge focused waves of sound at the buildings breaking glasses and making the walls crumble partially. Nightbeat holds his head as it slowly dawns on him that there are Decepticons at this gas station. Tiny little Decepticons. His headache intensifies, and he narrates, "Of all the gas stations in the world, I just hadta drive into this one." What lousy luck. Barrage assumes his bulky robot mode. Americon looks at the pair of talking legs. "Yeah, I know, and there's like, legs everywhere and stuff!" Americon says. "Also, I robbed this gas station! Go get your own!" Meanwhile, Stalker Girl creeps up on Americon, slowly, slowly... she winces and puts her hands over her ears... then starts creeping up again... Barrage runs to Americon, "Hey! Are you just going to sit there and drink!?" He looks at Nightbeat, "Hi there, out of gas?" He strokes his chin thoughtfully and looks at Americon, "Hmm. Do you think Autobots drink... water?" He says in a tone of voice that suggests he is a bully. Nightbeat squints, peering around the pump at Americon and then at Barrage, and he tries hazily, "Uh you have the right to remain silent? And I'd kind of appreciate it if you did." He taps the side of his head. Ow. Americon peers back at Nightbeat as they finally make optic contact. "Oh, you have a head, too. That is very good! Try not to lose it or anything!" To Barrage, he yells, "I do not know, but running on water is perfectly unAmerican enough for those stinking Autobots! Hahaha!" His hearty laughter is suddenly interrupted as Stalker Lady jumps him and starts slashing him with something! "AAUUUGH!" Americon screams. Barrage approaches Nightbeat slowly and looks at him. Suddenly he shouts, "SHUDDAP!" as he calms down he adds, "That's how you ask for silenc--" His words are interrupted as he hears Americon scream, his gauss rifles preparing to fire at something. Nightbeat is a Headmaster! Oh wait, he's not. Well, he could be if he ever handed his head over to some little green men. Anyway, he has a head, yes. He grouses, "I have a headACHE." He then boggles a human... attacks Americon? Nighbeat claps his hands over his audios as Barrage approaches, and he mumbles, "What the... Americon screams in agony as the possibly insane woman continues to slash him with a shiny object. "OH GOD THE PAIN IS SOMEWHAT IRRITATING!" Barrage snarls, "Why don't you just step on it than rather let it slash you?" He falls silent for a moment and looks at Nightbeat, poking him in the chest, "Now THAT is some really bad choice of color. I mean come on! Don't you have some pride at all? Look at yourself!? DISGUSTING!" Nightbeat attempts to smack Barrage away with utter disdain and scorn, replying, "Do you have any idea how many knees of little punks like you I hadta break to get this paintjob? Do you? Because I been thinkin' about getting some detailing done, and your knees look mighty tempting. ...is she wit' the EDC or what?" He gestures over at the human. Nightbeat succeeds in grasping Barrage, throwing it off-balance. Americon yells back, "I can't step on her, I'm barely taller than she is! But wait, I am still a robot, armed with deadly weapons!" He grins, whips out a blaster, turns around, and points it at the human. "Eat hot death, you harpy!" ZAT! The woman falls over, a smoking hole in her chest and a surprised look on her face. "Hahahaha, I have triumphed over a defenseless human! My ego has been successfully boosted!" Americon cries. Barrage rocks back and staggers of balance. There is a surprised look on his face, but before he whips out his flamethrowers he looks over to Americon and laughs. No wait. He cackles. "Hahahahaha. She was a defenseless human! Nice!" he screams and than turns towards Nightbeat again. Approaching him he pokes his forehead, "I am serious really. Sheesh! Orange? With blue?" His optical modules twist, "Tasteless! YUCK! I suggest breaking more knees and getting a decent paint job. Look at yourself! You are not even worth shooting like that! Roll over!" He barks out with a order at the end of his statements. Nightbeat cries out, "You're doing it wrong! You don't take the gas, shoot the people, and then sit there! You shoot them, take the gas, and run. Then there's a car chase. Primus. Why is everyone so *defective* here?" He again attempts to smack Barrage, and he insists, "You're colourblind." Nightbeat succeeds in grasping Barrage, throwing it off-balance. Americon blinks, looking around. "You mean I'm supposed to run or something?" Barrage staggers again. This time he is not surprised. Rather, he is amused. He approaches Nightbeat, his hand raising up to poke at his optical modules, "There is nothing wrong with my optical modules," He retorts. "But your are gonna be defect!" he attempts to poke at his optical modules. "And your color STINKS!" Barrage misses Nightbeat with its grasp attack. Americon yells, "Hey, Barrage, stop fighting that Autobot for like, FIVE seconds and tell me what happened to my back! I'd rip my head off and look at it that way, but that would hurt a lot!" He turns around, presenting his back to the Decepticon. "Well?" Nightbeat is very protective of his optics, and so he ducks under Barrage's eye poke, insisting, "Decepticons have no taste! It is a proven fact. Says so in the Detective Handbook." Barrage looks at Americon's back. His optical modules flaring for a moment, "Uh oh... you like America right?" He inquires.. "Well, that woman was a very very very good artist it seems." He ignores Nightbeat for a moment. Americon peers over his shoulder at Barrage. "What?! Explain and clarify! All she did was slash me completely at random... uh.. right?" Nightbeat tries to see what it is the two little Decepticons are on about, now that they've taken a break from murder and mayhem. Barrage shakes his head. "You have a flag of america drawn on your back... I think you killed a patriot!" He begins to giggle malevolence welling up inside him and he breaks out into a all out hellish cackle, falling to the floor and rolling in a fit of laughter slamming the asphalt with his fists. "You-- you... hahahaha. killed a PATRIOT! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH--" Americon's jaw drops. He stares at Barrage for a moment... then... rushes to the woman's side. "No... I... she was still alive when I was last saw her!" Then he leans back, shouting at the heavens, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooOOOOOOOoooooOOOOO dammit." Nightbeat would cite some corny lesson about killing a book by its cover, but seriously, he's Nightbeat. He doesn't do that kind of slag. Instead, Nightbeat just opines, "Ohyeah. It's a real nice tat. It'll photograph well when they book you and take glossies." Barrage smirks, "You shot her in the CHEST! Right, she was alive... perhaps in your dreams!" He begins to laugh again and than suddenly stops turning towards Nightbeat, stretching up to his full height, he attempts to poke him at the forehead. "Your handbook sucks. All over the decepticon controlled lands is a statement to awesome taste. And your autobot taste just -- SUCKS." Barrage misses Nightbeat with its grasp attack. Americon sniffs, taking the body into his arms and standing up. "I... I must bury this proud American woman, and perhaps my OWN SINS, for I done her a great wrong." He hangs his head as he walks out of the gas station.
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