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| - Purple: Hey! Invader Slacks! It's Probing Day! Whaddya think of that, huh? Huh!?! Red: (interrupting Purple) You've blended in well with the large nostril people of Boodie Nen, blah, blah, blah... Purple: Now if you'll just show us a little puppet show depicting how you plan to destroy the planet... Invader Slacks: (Gasps) Puppet show!?! Red: Everyone loves puppets! Except you, it seems. You fail inspection! Purple: You get a... pummeling! (chuckles) Red: Happy Probing Day, Invader Slacks! Invader Slacks: I shall... (a mallet hits him again and he groans) try harder, sirs! Zim: But you MUST see this!
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| abstract
| - Purple: Hey! Invader Slacks! It's Probing Day! Whaddya think of that, huh? Huh!?! Red: (interrupting Purple) You've blended in well with the large nostril people of Boodie Nen, blah, blah, blah... Purple: Now if you'll just show us a little puppet show depicting how you plan to destroy the planet... Invader Slacks: (Gasps) Puppet show!?! Red: Everyone loves puppets! Except you, it seems. You fail inspection! Purple: You get a... pummeling! (chuckles) Red: Happy Probing Day, Invader Slacks! Invader Slacks: I shall... (a mallet hits him again and he groans) try harder, sirs! Purple: You know, ever since we became the Tallest, I... I dunno. It's neat. And Probing Day just makes it even better! Red: Hey, Zim's next on the list... Red: ... should we even inspect him? I mean, he's not really an Invader and... we hate him! Zim (voice only): Greetings, my Tallest! Purple: Zim! We didn't call for you! You know, you're interrupting a very important- Zim: Today's Probing Day, yes? Well, I'm ready for my inspection and I think you'll find that I am prepared! Purple: How about we just pummel you and call it done? Zim: But you MUST see this! Zim: I have prepared a human experiment! Red: Look, Zim, we have some pummeling to do and eh... oh, hurry up, alright. Zim: This bothersome dirt child was captured trying to infiltrate my base! I've suspended him in a variable time stasis field. I made it myself! Does it not amaze you!?! Dib: You'll never get away with this, Zim! I'm going to- Dib (slowed down): -expose you... Dib (sped up): For the horrible alien menace that you are (the field returns to normal) and scoop your insides out! Zim: Huh!?! Purple: Well you look real busy exploding, Zim. Red: (sarcastically) What a shame. Moving on now! Invader Slacks (voicing puppets): Doo! Doo dee doo do doo do doo. Purple: Yeah! Yeah! Two words: more puppets! Yeah! Zim: The Dib human! He seems to have been vaporized! Victory for Zim! Wait... Look at this place! Gaah! Probing Day is ruined! The Tallest said they would call back in an hour! GIR: No they didn't! Zim: Wait! If I can fix up the base before they call... GIR! Begin clean up and repairs now! GIR: I don't wanna! GIR: Okay! Tumor lady: Hey! Look at that! It's one of them big head boys! Zim: GIR! Remove... whatever that thing is! GIR: Yaaaay! It burns! Zim: Quite playing around, GIR! I thought I told you to get rid of this! Zim: Computer! Analyze this thing! Computer: Thing is resulting explosion from destruction of time stasis field! Zim: An explosion? Why is it not exploded then? Tell me now! Computer: Explosion co-bonded with the time stasis field. Computer: Result- explosion is exploding really, really slowly. Explosion cannot be extinguished. Explosion must expand to its (the computer coughs) inevitable size. Zim: What is that size? And why is my computer coughing? Zim: Yes... Zim: Yes! Zim: No! Zim: No!! Zim: Enough already! Solutions, give me solutions! Solutions, give me solutions! Computer: Explosion could be dampened, perhaps. Zim: The city cess pool! Of course! Of course! Zim: We'll drown this thing in garbage and then get back here before the Tallest call back! Computer: I didn't... say anything about the city cess pool. Zim: Yes! Ingenious! Come, GIR! GIR: K, a little to the left. Step foreword. Okay, look out for the monkey. Zim: Got it. Okay. How am I doing? Okay, monkey. Got it. Okay. GIR: Okay, look out for the other monkey. Okay? Zim: Okay. Got it. Oh no! Zim: Oh no! Oh no! GIR: Okay? Zim: Okay. Look out! Zim: We cannot fail, GIR! Zim: Even as a small Irken Smeet, my dream was to pass Probing Day like a Slorbees passes her young: Jiggly, and full of juice! I must- Zim: Oh, we're here! Zim: That was you're fault, GIR! You're bad! Zim: Just another challenge! GIR! Cross to the Voot Cruiser and work the tractor beam! I'll hold the explosion here until you grab it with the beam! Hurry! GIR: Look what I found! GIR: He smells real bad! Zim: GIR! Stop! No! Leave! Zim: Plan B! Zim: We have to hurry, GIR! It's growing faster! Dib (slowed down): Must find help! Tumor lady: Huh, look at him run all slow-like! Zim: Quickly, GIR! We haven't much time! Zim: Look! The city cess pool! Smells like human... Hugh Monstro: Hey! Come-a back-a with-a my meat! Zim: Dog with meat! Dog with meat! Zim: Ho oh oh... Police officer: I'll show you not to stand around and do nothin'! Police officer: Run for your lives! Police officer: Hmm... Police officer: Oh, whaddya make a that? Old woman: Run! Old woman: Run!!! She looks at how slow the explosion is. Old woman: Well, uh... Walking's fine, honey. Megaphone guy: Evacuate the city! Um... Megaphone guy: No hurry, though. Just... you know, whenever. Zim: The Tallest are gonna call soon! Zim: I just know it! Base... so messy... and explosion so close! This is just horrible! GIR: I know what you meeean. Zim: That's it! Time! GIR: What you saaaay? Zim: If I can bring the time field around the explosion back up to regular speed, it'll fix everything! GIR: No it won't! Zim: The explosion will blow up like normal and be gone forever! GIR: But won't it just explode? Just like this- KABLAM! Zim: Do not interrupt my being ingenious! But I'll need another fragment of the time field as a trigger. The Dib monkey was in the field... Zim: Too bad he was destroyed... GIR: But no! No he wasn't! Zim: He wasn't!?! Good! Let's get him! GIR: Won't the s'ploding hurt? Zim: Do not question Zim! Dib (slowed down): Almost to police! Dib (slowed down): Almost to.. Dib (slowed down): Zim! Dib (slowed down): You're just going to blow us all up? This is stupid! Dib (slowed down): This is stupid! Stupid! Zim: There! I've accelerated Dib's time field to cancel out the field around the explosion. Computer! What's the angle of trajectory? Computer: 36 mark 2. But seriously, Zim. If you just speed up the explosion- Zim: I don't pay you to contradict me! Computer: You don't pay me at all. GIR: But if the big s'plodey goes fast, won't it get all bad? Zim: I am Zim! Red: Thank you, Invader Larb. Happy Probing Day! Purple: Well, was that everyone? I hope that was everyone! Let's go, I'm hungry! Red: Well, there is Zim but (Purple rises from the floor) I think he stopped being alive! Oh well, let's see! Purple: Hmmm... Okaaay... Red: Wow. Zim: Hello! Hello!?! I am here, my Tallest! My Tallest!?! Noooo! Dib: You jerk!
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