Ivanasti Chestikov is one of Russia's finest footballers, scoring many goals, even more than Peter Shilton. After winning World Footballer of the Year in 1972 at the age of 24, he invented the tobacco toaster, a device that makes bread taste like cigar smoke. He won the Nobel Insanity Prize the following year after analysing the eeble and keeping a pet elephant under his bed for almost six months.
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