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Walter Tell, the ill-fated son of most-of-the-time master marksman William Tell, was the first documented person to engage in the act of freeform death articulation. According to historical documents, the young master Tell stood about one hundred yards from his arrow-wielding father with an apple upon his head. Never doubting his father's abilities, Tell patiently waited for the sharp spear to be hurled towards his cranium. Unfortunately for Walter, father William Tell had been at the bar in the evening prior, drinking 3-for-1 Pabst's Blue Ribbons and singing "Peace of Mind" by Boston into the wee hours of the morning. So there they stood: father, son, apple, arrow. With a belch and a yodel, William Tell triggered his crossbow, lunging the arrow forth. And one second later, Walter Tell gaz

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rdfs:label
  • Interpretive Death
rdfs:comment
  • Walter Tell, the ill-fated son of most-of-the-time master marksman William Tell, was the first documented person to engage in the act of freeform death articulation. According to historical documents, the young master Tell stood about one hundred yards from his arrow-wielding father with an apple upon his head. Never doubting his father's abilities, Tell patiently waited for the sharp spear to be hurled towards his cranium. Unfortunately for Walter, father William Tell had been at the bar in the evening prior, drinking 3-for-1 Pabst's Blue Ribbons and singing "Peace of Mind" by Boston into the wee hours of the morning. So there they stood: father, son, apple, arrow. With a belch and a yodel, William Tell triggered his crossbow, lunging the arrow forth. And one second later, Walter Tell gaz
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dbkwik:uncyclopedi...iPageUsesTemplate
Revision
  • 3330760(xsd:integer)
Date
  • 2008-09-29(xsd:date)
abstract
  • Walter Tell, the ill-fated son of most-of-the-time master marksman William Tell, was the first documented person to engage in the act of freeform death articulation. According to historical documents, the young master Tell stood about one hundred yards from his arrow-wielding father with an apple upon his head. Never doubting his father's abilities, Tell patiently waited for the sharp spear to be hurled towards his cranium. Unfortunately for Walter, father William Tell had been at the bar in the evening prior, drinking 3-for-1 Pabst's Blue Ribbons and singing "Peace of Mind" by Boston into the wee hours of the morning. So there they stood: father, son, apple, arrow. With a belch and a yodel, William Tell triggered his crossbow, lunging the arrow forth. And one second later, Walter Tell gazed in amazement at the wooden stake, which was now protruding from his stomach. Walter knew he was too far away to articulate his onset death in words. But ever eager to make his father aware of his imminent demise, Walter threw a hand in the air and fell to his knees. With a rocking of the hips he flailed his body, waving one arm rapidly. "I say sir, it does so appear that your young son is informing you of him being quite near to death," remarked Master Tell's assistant. "Yes," replied Tell. "And with the grace of a gaelic swan upon the glowing Rhine river." File:Id05.gif
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