| contenu
| - ATTENTION ALL RECRUITS
RE: SPECIALIZED DEPARTMENTAL EVALUATION
Namaste.
I am pleased to announce the release of the sixth assessment in the Dharma Initiative's Volunteer Recruitment Program is now available at www.dharmawantsyou.com.
This latest assessment has been specifically designed around the results of your previous examinations.
It is a multiple-choice exam and aims to determine your suitability for a number of departments within the Dharma Initiative.
Additionally, a select group of talented recruits have contributed to this examination. The outstanding efforts of these individuals stand as an example to us all.
The following recruits have been officially promoted to 'Instructor' status;
Bboepple, DanyWho, Ellenh, Iseibert, Lost4evr, Mattabramson, Orangemoonbeam, Sawyer78, Wrinkledogs.
Instructors will receive an official Dharma Initiative Instructor t-shirt for their efforts.
IMPORTANT: SECURITY UPDATE
Please be aware that investigations are continuing into the latest security breach discovered around the Volunteer Recruitment Program. Measures are being implemented to preserve the integrity of the program and to ascertain the identity of 'Black Swan'. Additionally, assessment data is being analyzed in order to determine which recruits may have exploited confidential information.
Recruits found to have benefited illegally from this material will be dealt with appropriately by the Dharma Initiative's Recruit Evaluation Panel.
In the meantime, I urge all recruits to avoid contact with the material being distributed by 'Black Swan'. The integrity of the entire Volunteer Recruitment program is at risk.
Namaste.
Hans Van Eeghen
Head of Recruiting
The Dharma Initiative
- Namaste, my recruits. I trust you are well. I am sure many of you were expecting to undertake the seventh and final test of the Volunteer Recruitment Program. Well, I take great pleasure in revealing that you have already completed this most challenging exam. I realise this may be a surprise to some so let me share with you the title of the test. Perhaps it will help explain this unexpected turn of events. "The Integrity, Honor, and Honesty Assesment". Throughout the volunteer recruitment program recruits were covertly supplied with cheat codes which, if utilised, provided an unfair advantage in the testing procedure. These codes were distributed by the ever persistent Black Swan. Despite repeated warnings to ignore Black Swan's communications a significant proportion of recruits exploited these codes. However, what these recruits did not understand was that Black Swan's codes were also a test. A test that I have been orchestrating since the very beginning of recruitment. A test of their integrity. I, of course, am Black Swan. This deception was always part of my design for the recruitment process. It is not in my nature to behave in this way but in this situation it was necessary. The Dharma Initiative has been betrayed by those close to it before. We had to take seriously the possibility it could happen again. I must admit, however, I never anticipated how many talented recruits would be so easily tempted. How many would be without integrity, honor, or honesty. As a result these recruits have failed the seventh test. Furthermore the future of the Dharma Initiative is also under review. For those of you who did not resort to using the code you have naturally passed the integrity test. You are to be commended for your honesty. The officials reviewing your results will look very favourably on this outcome. Congratulations. This document contains the raw data collected from all recruits during the testing procedures. Individual test scores, cumulative scores, averages, groups, Dharma points, cheat codes utililised; it is all here. And their are a number of observations I could make from just a preliminary examination of the test data. But that would be improper. As stipulated by official procedure your results will now go to the Dharma Initiative's recruit evaluation panel for review. The outcome of which will determine within the Dharma Initiative's current project. On behalf of the Dharma Initiative, I would like to thank you all for your efforts over the last seven weeks. The final decision regarding your position within upcoming research activities will now be left in the hands of my superiors. Results will be released after December 15. Good luck to you all, and as the great French philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau argued "Patience is bitter but it's fruit is sweet". Namaste.
- ATTENTION ALL RECRUITS
RE: TANGENTIAL JUDGMENT ANALYSIS IS NOW LIVE
Namaste.
I am pleased to announce the release of the fourth assessment in the Dharma Initiative's
Volunteer Recruitment Program is now available at www.dharmawantsyou.com.
This new test will assess your ability to formulate imaginative solutions to a range of
conundrums.
Many of you have already demonstrated your ability to think "outside the octagon", so to
speak. I am sure you will find this activity suitably stimulating.
I am also happy to report that a great number of you have enthusiastically embraced the
recently released "Recruit Created Assessments" . Industrious recruits are devising for
their colleagues a dizzying array of examination topics that will, no doubt, significantly
expand the knowledge base of the Dharma Initiative.
These talented recruits not only stand to significantly increase their Dharma Points but will
also be eligible for promotion to the position of "Instructor" in the Volunteer Recruitment
Program.
On behalf of the Dharma Initiative I would like to thank these conscientious recruits for their
efforts.
Keep up the good work.
Namaste.
Hans Van Eeghen
Head of Recruiting
The Dharma Initiative
- ATTENTION ALL RECRUITS
RE: FINAL RECRUIT EVALUATION
Namaste.
I am extremely pleased to announce that the seventh and final test in the Dharma Initiative's Volunteer Recruitment Program is now available at www.dharmawantsyou.com.
This test plays an extremely important part in determining your final role within the Dharma Initiative's upcoming research project.
This test is, perhaps, the most challenging recruits have yet encountered in the Volunteer Recruitment Program. A great deal is demanded of you in this final examination. It is an excellent opportunity to distinguish yourself in the eyes of assessors.
Once you have completed the seventh assessment your overall results will be collated and delivered to the Volunteer Recruit Evaluation Panel for analysis. The members of this distinguished panel will make recommendations to myself, as the Head of Recruiting, regarding the specific departmental position appropriate for each recruit. Upon my review I will formally present the recommendations to the executive board of the Dharma Initiative for final approval.
Final recruit departmental positions and results will be outlined in your personalized Volunteer Assessment Dossier, which will available for download from DharmaWantsYou.com after December 15, 2008.
Good luck to you all.
Namaste.
Hans Van Eeghen
Head of Recruiting
The Dharma Initiative
- ATTENTION ALL RECRUITS
RE: RELEASE OF TEST 5 AND
CLOSING DATE OF RECRUITMENT PROGRAM
Namaste.
I am pleased to announce the release of the fifth assessment in the Dharma Initiative's Volunteer Recruitment Program is now available at www.dharmawantsyou.com.
The latest test in the program is a Numeric Projection Evaluation. It will assess a recruit's ability to recognize a variety of patterns in numeric series.
In response to the impressive progress of a number of recruits I have devised a number of particularly challenging questions in this latest evaluation.
IMPORTANT: CLOSING DATE OF RECRUITMENT PROGRAM
Please be aware that the Volunteer Recruitment Program will officially close at 12:00PM PDT on October 7, 2008.
All testing procedures, including Recruit Created Assessments, will be inaccessible after this date.
All recruits are advised to complete their assessments by this time.
Following the completion of the program, the Recruit Evaluation Panel will collect all assessment data for processing and analysis in order to determine final volunteer roles and group allocations within the Dharma Initiative's latest research project. This information will be collated in a personalized Volunteer Assessment Dossier for each recruit.
Having supervised the recruitment program thus far, I am extremely optimistic that the ranks of the Dharma Initiative will soon be greatly enhanced by the new recruits.
Namaste.
Hans Van Eeghen
Head of Recruiting
The Dharma Initiative
- Nameste my recruits. Today I have again taken the decision to address you all in a video presentation in the hope that it may drive home the gravity of my message. It has come to my attention that a number of recruits were exposed to cheat codes in recent tests. We do not yet know how many recruits exploited this information to their advantage but be assured, we are investigating. This latest breach is most definitely related to the previous Black Swan incidents. Most disturbingly, I have discovered these breaches have originated from within the Dharma Initiative itself. It appears Black Swan is someone within this noble organization. It is not yet clear what this person's motivation might be, but we are doing everything in our power to gain the upper hand in this contest. In the meantime, I urge all recruits to avoid contact with the material Black Swan is releasing. These cheats threaten to contaminate the integrity of the entire testing program. If you discover what appears to be a cheat, I urge you not to view or investigate the material further. In any case, I thank you for your dedication to the Dharma Initiative's vision and wish you well in your remaining assessments. Nameste.
- Namaste.
I am pleased to announce that registered recruits can now log in and download your personalized Volunteer Assessment Dossier outlining your full test results as well as your position within the Dharma Initiative.
I want to personally congratulate you on behalf of everyone at the Dharma Initiative for your hard work and diligence during our testing process.
We hope that you are happy with your results. We certainly are. The tests were extremely challenging and the aptitude and excellence displayed far exceeded our expectations.
Now that you are in possession of your results I am sure you are asking the obvious question: what's next?
Our plan was that together we would commence a glorious adventure: the revival of the Dharma Initiative using the myriad talents of all our amazing new recruits. We imagined not just fulfilling long abandoned goals but taking the Dharma Initiative to a new level of greatness as an organization promoting the peaceful social and technological advancement of all humankind.
Then the financial crisis struck.
Sadly, our benefactors were not immune to this crisis. In fact, unconfirmed reports suggest that much of the money designated for the work of the new Dharma Initiative was tied up in highly leveraged mortgage derivatives. This, however, cannot be confirmed because, I am sorry to report, the principals representing the benefactors - my employers - have gone missing. Based on bills still coming into our office we believe they are somewhere in South America.
This stunning reversal of fortune has forced us to abandon our ambitious plans. In fact, absent this funding, the Dharma Initiative was forced to make the only sensible decision we had available: we sold the Dharma Initiative to the television show LOST.
While this might strike some of you as a shock, the reason for this was not simply that they were the only bidder. As the only remaining Dharma Initiative employee who had not fled the country, I felt that at the very least the show would be able to keep the spirit of the Dharma Initiative alive and in the public consciousness until such time as a reversal of the reversal of our economic fortunes occurs.
It is with a heavy heart that I must bid you farewell. Despite my fervent commitment to the mission of the Dharma Initiative, the realities of a broken marriage, heavy casino debt and some unfounded police charges have required that I change my present circumstances. It is with great excitement that I can inform you of my pending senior sales management job at a large multi-brand auto dealership in Dubai. I have enjoyed our brief association more than I can ever express, and if you are ever in the Middle East and need a car, please e-mail me for a special "Dharma rate".
In the meantime, you will hear shortly from LOST showrunners Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse. They will explain to you their future plans for the Dharma Initiative and how these plans might affect you.
Thank you again, personally, for your unflagging commitment and support. I hope our paths will one day cross again. In the meantime may the spirit of the island guide you.
Namaste.
Hans Van Eeghen
Head of Recruiting
The Dharma Initiative
|
![[RDF Data]](/fct/images/sw-rdf-blue.png)