About: Jax Pavan 123   Sponge Permalink

An Entity of Type : dbkwik:resource/8o1p8DBc7tTqR4sOpNWJXA==, within Data Space : 134.155.108.49:8890 associated with source dataset(s)

Jax Pavan, also known by his Christian name of Brother Maynard, was one of the 582,797,754 Human males named Jax Pavan on Coruscant. He was a monk living in the Holy Garbage Can of Antioch before and at the beginning of the Jax Pavan Holy War. He became obsessed with his job, to watch over the Can,(Which he found quite boring, especially because he had to remain celibate (DAMN!)), and wanted nothing more from life than to see the can fulfill its purpose, to PWN all things around it (including himself). As such, he pulled and destroyed the Holy Pin. Since then, every day, he would count in an attempt to activate the holy device but he would never reach the correct number. He would always stop at two, skip to four, or even skip to five. Never reaching three, the number that shalt be counted

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  • Jax Pavan 123
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  • Jax Pavan, also known by his Christian name of Brother Maynard, was one of the 582,797,754 Human males named Jax Pavan on Coruscant. He was a monk living in the Holy Garbage Can of Antioch before and at the beginning of the Jax Pavan Holy War. He became obsessed with his job, to watch over the Can,(Which he found quite boring, especially because he had to remain celibate (DAMN!)), and wanted nothing more from life than to see the can fulfill its purpose, to PWN all things around it (including himself). As such, he pulled and destroyed the Holy Pin. Since then, every day, he would count in an attempt to activate the holy device but he would never reach the correct number. He would always stop at two, skip to four, or even skip to five. Never reaching three, the number that shalt be counted
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dbkwik:darth/prope...iPageUsesTemplate
Eyes
  • Brown
Affiliation
Hair
  • Brown
Name
  • Brother Maynard
  • Jax Pavan 123
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Homeworld
Gender
abstract
  • Jax Pavan, also known by his Christian name of Brother Maynard, was one of the 582,797,754 Human males named Jax Pavan on Coruscant. He was a monk living in the Holy Garbage Can of Antioch before and at the beginning of the Jax Pavan Holy War. He became obsessed with his job, to watch over the Can,(Which he found quite boring, especially because he had to remain celibate (DAMN!)), and wanted nothing more from life than to see the can fulfill its purpose, to PWN all things around it (including himself). As such, he pulled and destroyed the Holy Pin. Since then, every day, he would count in an attempt to activate the holy device but he would never reach the correct number. He would always stop at two, skip to four, or even skip to five. Never reaching three, the number that shalt be counted to activate the device. Every time a visitor would come to the Can, he would attempt to trick them into counting the correct sequence of numbers for him with a variety of means. He was never successful, as all visitors were well versed in their histories, until a group of rat warriors were sent to the Can by another Jax Pavan in an attempt to disable the superweapon. They were ill-witted and easily tricked into counting themselves, resulting in them counting to three as they had killed Scrat mere minutes before. The Can exploded, killing them, this Pavan, and all the kittens within a twenty mile radius. Maynard died happily knowing that he had finally fulfilled his dream of seeing the Can used. Unfortunately, he went to Hell for committing assisted suicide and several thousand attempts at suicide.
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