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| - Also known as the weirdest match we'll ever have. Normally at the end a round I do kind of a wrap-up, but it's not really worth it to get too extensive here. Our closest match involved Waluigi winning, which is really all you need to know about this entire contest. Regardless, this match was so dumb. Before the contest ever started, a lot of us asked Allen if Einstein vs Hitler would be eligible. He said no, because "Gamespot already did it". Oddly enough, it was Einstein he considered the problem and not a guy who slaughtered anywhere between 6 and 15 million people, depending on what you read. This match was destined to be the 4chan target of choice, and for a time they didn't disappoint. They even had the picture advantage, because holy crap did Soraku look like garbage. Soraku started over 60%, fell all the way down to 54% with rallying, then people noticed the rallying wasn't working so they went back up to 60%. Hitler was never really in contention to win this match, which is honestly a good thing. I'm all for a good joke, but Hitler making some L-Block run would have been really offensive to me and a lot of other people. I know he's made to look like a total joke in Wolfenstein 3D, but it's the principle of the matter. This would conclude round 1, and all things considered Allen really just got unlucky with the bracket. A lot of cool upsets just didn't pan out, a lot of the pairings were just bad, and a lot of potential upsets or good matches just turned into blowouts. Pair that with a bad concept, a questionable selection process and a bad bracket design and you get... pretty much the worst contest ever, actually. I would say the villains contest had a worse round 1, but at least that contest was nice enough to only be a month long in total. We had over a month and a half of this rivalry blowout junk.
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