About: Link is a towel

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About: Link is a towel Sponge Permalink

An Entity of Type : owl:Thing, within Data Space : 134.155.108.49:8890 associated with source dataset(s)

Link is a seemingly young and sweet little elf boy, with big eyes and an animated appearance. He lives on a small tropical island called Outset, with his younger sister Aryll, and his nameless Grandmother. However, this innocent facade is simply an elaborate coverup, due to the fact that Link is a towel. How is this possible, you ask? Well, why don't you shut the hell up, it's a Zelda game, anything is possible.

Attributes	Values
rdfs:label	Link is a towel
rdfs:comment	Link is a seemingly young and sweet little elf boy, with big eyes and an animated appearance. He lives on a small tropical island called Outset, with his younger sister Aryll, and his nameless Grandmother. However, this innocent facade is simply an elaborate coverup, due to the fact that Link is a towel. How is this possible, you ask? Well, why don't you shut the hell up, it's a Zelda game, anything is possible.
dcterms:subject	Crack
abstract	Link is a seemingly young and sweet little elf boy, with big eyes and an animated appearance. He lives on a small tropical island called Outset, with his younger sister Aryll, and his nameless Grandmother. However, this innocent facade is simply an elaborate coverup, due to the fact that Link is a towel. How is this possible, you ask? Well, why don't you shut the hell up, it's a Zelda game, anything is possible. Link is not related to his family. Grandmother and Aryll are undercover FBI agents keeping his cottony identity a secret from prying eyes. His outward self must remain intact, if not for the sake of the past Links-- they might feel inferior, should it be known that their successor is but the most plush, soft green towel anyone's rupees could ever buy. It's really quite a scandal. After the kidnapping of his pseudo!sister, Link set sail with the mighty pirate captain, Tetra. Jealous of the little towel, she set about mocking his tender, young fibres to make herself feel better. It is unknown at this point, but it is a likely suggestion that she prefers the "be mean until they like you back" strategy when picking out her men. In an extreme case of desperacy for her romantic feelings to be known, she raised her method to new levels by ditching him to fend for himself at the Forsaken Fortress. Ouch. Link was flung out to sea and left to die, doomed to be waterlogged and dragged to the bottom of the sea where his salty grave awaited him, aready festering with other towels long since abandoned by drooling children on beaches. But, to his own luck, a talking red boat discovered him and saved the towel from his demise. Once the youth regained his consciousness the boat explained its identity as the King of Red Lions, hooked Link up as a sail, and their adventure together on the Great Sea began....

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