S3ahawk 22:11, August 14, 2010 (UTC) I'll take a shot at this.-- 21:56, September 14, 2010 (UTC)
Attributes | Values |
---|
rdfs:label
| - Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Guilty Gear
|
rdfs:comment
| - S3ahawk 22:11, August 14, 2010 (UTC) I'll take a shot at this.-- 21:56, September 14, 2010 (UTC)
|
dcterms:subject
| |
Mcomment
| |
Pcomment
| - This is written quite well, so there are no problems with your prose.
On the subject of formatting, your article also doesn’t look horrible. But you may want to resize your pictures so they are around the same size, and spread them out more around the article, some on the left as well, etc... At the moment they don’t look particularly good where they are, and at their current sizes.
|
Icomment
| - Your images are not exactly funny, but you have actually places them well so they fit in where they should be, next to their corresponding paragraphs. A big mistake that a lot of people make it just spreading out their images, but putting them in random places. You have put them in the right places.
But normal pictures need funny captions. Unfortunately, your captions aren’t the funniest things ever. Good captions add a lot of humor to your article, because it makes an image funny. So really work on your captions and spend some time on them, because they can be real humor gold if done well.
Oh, and images captions still need full stops! Just saying…
|
Pscore
| |
Ccomment
| - I have never heard of this game before. However, this is not a surprise, as I am not a gamer. At all. But a quick check on Wikipedia answered all my questions, so I’m ok with everything now. And while I'm on this subject, you should always try and write your article so even someone who has no idea what you are talking about can get the jokes and laugh.
As I have already said, you have lots of space to add some good parody humor about this concept, which you haven’t quite used to it’s potential. You really have to find the weak points and silly things about your subject and use them to create something funny.
But I feel you could put more into this! Check out the Wikipedia article on Runescape or WOW – they have very big articles on some subjects. See how much detail they talk about? All those sections? You can really try and build on your article by thinking of every aspects and feature of the game. Shorter articles are always better then overlong, bulky things, but it would be good to take a look at every aspect of the game you can.
|
Cscore
| |
Mscore
| |
Hcomment
| |
Iscore
| |
Hscore
| |
Fcomment
| - Ok, so I’ve been really harsh with the scores. But you really, really need to add a lot more humor into this. That is the biggest problem here and you have to really try and parody your subject, milk out every laugh you can. At the moment there isn’t much that funny here.
But I have seen some of your works – you are a really good writer. If you try hard you can definitely fix up this article so it is the best it can be.
I hope I have helped here, at least a little!
|
dbkwik:uncyclopedi...iPageUsesTemplate
| |
Signature
| |
abstract
| - S3ahawk 22:11, August 14, 2010 (UTC) I'll take a shot at this.-- 21:56, September 14, 2010 (UTC)
|