As real women (e. g., Pamela Anderson) become less and less available to real men (i. e., bald, fat, slovenly pigs who think about sex all the time), mechanical engineers at Mattel Adult Toy Company, makers of the controversial Barbie sex doll (free plug: "It it's Mattel, it'll swell") have united with Dr. Lauara Schlessinger to design submissive sex robots to fill the gap (so to speak).