"Captain's log, Stardate Eleventy-leven eighty six point negative nine. Charted a blah blah blah with my blah blah crew today, collecting samples of blah blah blah..." Aren't you tired of surveying all the brave new worlds and startling new civilizations of the galaxy with the safe, polite, politically correct members of the Federation? After all, they only have fun when they break their own rules and leave a communicator behind on a planet of curious mimics, or travel through time to play with tribbles. Wouldn't you rather travel the stars with me?