Weird is a state of mind. It is anything that can present itself as out of the ordinary. Simply defined, it is 'not normal', or odd. You may think it would take a really weird person to explain weirdness, but you would be wrong, and what a weird conclusion to come to! I, for instance, am totally unweird. Ordinary, conventional, even wholesome. Yep. But despite my orthodox averageness, I've spent years studying the subject, so please permit me to take you on a journey into the bizarre, the deviant and - my favorite - the uncouth. Hold onto your hat, because what you're about to see may shock you. It may even terrify you. But don't worry... I'll be right here. Looking over your shoulder.