Kratos, who's basically angry and pissed every minute of every day and enjoys screaming "I am the God of War!" over and over again, decides to get together some of his homies and shoot up to Rhodes to, y'know, massacre its inhabitants and shit. After a bit of bitchslapping between the SPARTAAAAAAAAANS and the Roadies, the Ballsuckus of Rhodes gets zapped by Big Bird and comes alive. Kratos rips off its hand and it has a nap in the middle of battle. Pfft. Baby. After a while Hey-Zeus shows up and throws the Spork of Paralympus into concrete and tells Kratos to hurry the fuck up and kill this sonuvabitch statue. Kratos, the dumbshit that he is, wastes all his godly power (and fluid) into the Spork, but manages to SABOHTEEORE the Ballsuckus from the inside.