Born in the 1840s in the Indian Territory (later the U.S. state of Oklahoma) to Sleeping Wolf (father), and Wah Nach (mother), Oakerhater was the second of three boys. His childhood name was Noksowist ("Bear Going Straight"), and he was raised as a traditional Cheyenne. His older brother was Little Medicine, and his younger brother was Wolf Tongue. Oakerhater married Nomee (translated as "Thunder Woman") in 1872. She died in 1880. They had four children, all of whom died young. Oakerhater also married, had at least one child, and divorced, a second woman, Nanessan ("Taking Off Dress").