Socks. Everybody has socks. More specifically, everybody has lots of lone halves of pairs of socks. What happens to all the missing socks? It's one of the mysteries of the universe, actually. Right up there with who-made-Earth and what's-in-a-can-of-cheese-whiz. Well, I don't really know. But! Our team of researchers have been working around the clock, a phrase which here means "whenever they can't come up with a good excuse not to, to come up with a good theory on the socks. They have used a tried and true method, known as "when in doubt, blame the devil".