Katon Dawson is the chairman of South Carolina's Republican Party. His life was unremarkable until one day he received a call from a with The Colbert Report. After a tense negotiation, Mr. Dawson gave Stephen this advice: “he could probably have more fun buying a sports car and getting a girlfriend.” This statement puts Mr. Dawson's Republican credentials into question. A girlfriend, Mr. Dawson? Seriously? A sports car? Why don't you tell Stephen to go to the Minneapolis Airport Bathroom and await further instructions?