1:1In the beginning God did create the heavens and the earth, but he fucked up, and flooded it. 1:2 Now the earth was formless and empty due to God's imcompetence. Fuck you God! You always have to ruin things! Now humans can't drain the resources and turn Earth into a ball of shit! Thanks a lot, God, you asshole. 1:3God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. 1:4God saw the light, and saw that it was good. God divided the light from the darkness. 1:5 God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” There was evening and there was morning, one day.