A character portrayed by Rich Fulcher in Series Two's Fountain of Youth. Evil Tree is a malignant walking tree roused by The Hitcher in an attempt to slow Howard and Vince so he can reach the Fountain of Youth before them. The Hitcher uses the chant: 'Evil Tree, Evil Tree, go about your wicked foul business!' When the Tree tries to attack Vince and Howard, Vince calls upon the help of Sandstorm who then erodes the Tree into a table and tells the table he will 'be back to varnish you later, you little pine tart'.