The invention of the tank is shrouded in mystery. Many believe Leonardo Davinci designed the first tank, while others believe that those people are liars and assholes. The first documentation of a tank being used in battle dates back to the 5th century A.D. An ancient Ethiopian artist's rendering of the battle of "click-click-whistle-click" (which is Ethiopian for something) clearly depicts Michael Clarke Duncan using his erect penis to destroy enemy forces in battle. Experts agree that Michael Clarke Duncan could be classified as a tank.