I am the world's most eeble sonk footballer. With a football, I can knock a small cheese sandwich off Jimbo's head from 0 metres. I can bend a ball round that tractor over there, under that spleeg and over Mr.Bean. In fact, Mr.Bean and Goerge W. Bush begged me to play against the Universal Cup Holders from burp . I beat them 0-nil and scored every goal with my nose.