One must have two villages full of burly men. They must be drunk, and pissed. Hand the burly men sticks. Place a sheep's bladder on the middle of the road that leads to both villages. Then get the fuck out of the way, but observe the mass carnage which ensues as hundreds of hairy oafs chase kick, hack and generally destroy each other. The fact that they may be on the same team is irrelevant: bonus points are scored for a higher kill count, regardless of their village of residence. The level of enjoyment that one can receive from watching football actually increases as his or her IQ decreases.