Chewbacca's mother was a mysterious female Wookiee who disappeared long ago, so long ago that some speculate she never existed in the first place. Chewbacca the Wookiee was a well-known personage in galactic history, and his father Attichitcuk, or "Itchy," embarrassed the world by indulging in holographic masturbation on a Christmas special, but meanwhile, where was Chewbacca's mother in all this? Itchy apparently lived in a household on Kashyyyk along with Chewbacca's long-suffering wife Malla and idiot son Lumpy. Could it be that Chewbacca had no mother? That he was conceived by the midi-chlorians out of some dollop of Itchy's Wookiee love-gunk?