Her Insular Majesty María II Gloria Punani Half-Dwarf, Half-Ewok National Panasonic Macapagal-Arroyo Puquercia XXI (also affectionately called simply as "the Dwarf") is the fourth True Queen of the cesspool that is the Philippines. She is the country's second non-male queen-slash-president after Corazon Aquino, and is also considered history's shortest head of state; shorter, in fact, than Napoleon. Frequently mistaken as an otaku that didn't quite climb high enough in the evolutionary ladder, rumour has it that the only reason people stand up during her speeches is because she's too damn short to be seen. She was also the son of former president Diosdado Macapagal before the threat of Woodstock forced him (Gloria, that is) to undergo sex-change surgery. According to medical reports, Glori