Born in 1934, DeFede grew up in the Queens borough of New York City. In his early days, he operated a hot dog vendor truck in Coney Island, Brooklyn, running numbers rackets on the side. A close friend and handball partner of Lucchese leader Vittorio Amuso, DeFede was inducted into the family in 1986 after Amuso became boss. DeFede's rise and fall in the New York mob can all be attributed to Amuso. DeFede drove a Cadillac and owned three race horses that he stabled at Aqueduct Racetrack in Queens. DeFede was married twice, and is currently wed to his second wife Nancy who entered the Witness Protection Program with him. The couple receive an annual income of $30,000 a year from Nancy's pension and a modest annuity provided by the U.S. Marshals Service.