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Follow My Instructions

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"They, uhh, might?" Added The Guy hopefully. The First guy glowered at Terry darkly. "Was it really necessary to use the condescending tone when you said 'you'?" The Narrator, who was busy relieving himself had fixed a large gulf between him and them, you know, to give him time to finish up. After crossing the last of the text mountains they arrived at his shady ranch. Laying down their equipment and removing their shoes (I don't like shoes, ok?) they walked slowly up to his amazingness. Ted, face touching the ground, trembled as he spoke.

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"They, uhh, might?" Added The Guy hopefully. The First guy glowered at Terry darkly. "Was it really necessary to use the condescending tone when you said 'you'?" The Narrator, who was busy relieving himself had fixed a large gulf between him and them, you know, to give him time to finish up. After crossing the last of the text mountains they arrived at his shady ranch. Laying down their equipment and removing their shoes (I don't like shoes, ok?) they walked slowly up to his amazingness. Terry, bowed face down before the great one, offering a parcel of food as an offering. "Oh great one, I pray forth unto you, that you may flash upon us the flashlight of inspiration, using all 7 watts of it's glory to spring an idea hence forth into our worthless literary minds." The mighty one, obscured by his own radiance, spoke forth unto the pair. His voice resonated throughout the mountains like a pubescent tremor. Trees were felled by it's power, and a dear hurt it's paw upon tripping over, the Narrator had spoken. Tery and that first guy, (let's say for convenience we'll call him Terry, no wait I mean, Fred,) backed away, the instructions given to them blaring through their minds like fire. They were to meet his brilliance at Penis Peak, a mere speck on the distant horizon. They journeyed on, trekking through wind and snow, trudging through porn infested sludge, swimming through the puddle they couldn't be arsed to walk round. They climbed to the tallest room in the tallest tower. They sunk to the lowest depth of the lowest cave (passing a jovial Bin Laden). Several months, and 56 Live Journal entries later they were there. Falling to the ground in exhaustion they rejoiced. A beam of blinding light fell down from the clouds, clothed in glory the narrator stepped down to earth. He lowered his chiseled face to Terry and Fred's level, smiling. Ted, face touching the ground, trembled as he spoke. The two humans grinned, ready for this grand epiphany. The Narrator looked Terry dead in the eye, he knew this would like, totally blow their minds. The very concept of it was genius. Brushing aside his own aura, he told them: "I guess you guys could always play chequers?"